TESTIMONY OF
PARRY AFTAB, ESQ.,
The Kids Internet Lawyer, Author and
Child Protection and Cybersafety Advocate
Child Protection and Cybersafety Advocate
BEFORE THE
U.S. HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES,
COMMITTEE ON
EDUCATION AND LABOR
Ensuring
Student Cyber Safety
Cyberbullying, Cybersafety and the Role of Industry in
Addressing the Issues
SUMMARY
Cybersafety involves protecting ourselves, our children, our
community and our networks. When minors are involved the programs and messages
have to be relevant, involve young people in their framing and be quick and
easy for parents. Schools often find themselves in the crossfire, especially
when cyberbullying among students or sexting images arise. At the same time,
the power of digital networks and interactive technology to spur creative
educational methods and engage students, parents and educators in
forward-thinking ways means we can’t sink our heads in the sand and have to
find a way to balance the benefits while containing the risks.
If we view cybersafety as a risk-management issue, it is
often easier to tackle. It includes copyright infringement and plagiarism,
responsible use, information literacy, digital literacy and digital hygiene,
privacy, security, misinformation and hype, sexual exploitation (including the rapid
growth of sexting), cyberbullying, ID theft and inappropriate, violent and
sexual content.
While my books and non-profit role, as Executive Director
and Founder of WiredSafety.org, span all risks for consumers and families
online, my particular passion is the prevention and ways to address
cyberbullying. I created StopCyberbullying.org to help parents, schools,
students, law enforcement and all stakeholders address the growing problem of
children hurting each other online.
To address cyberbullying adequately, in addition to
understanding the stakeholder perspectives, we have to develop educational
programs and materials, awareness of the issue and help for victims and their
families. We have to focus on character education, role modeling good behaviors
for our children and ways to get everyone involved and informed.
We also have to make it easier to understand the scope of
the risks and solutions to those risks. When it comes to addressing a big
problem from multiple perspectives, industry’s involvement is crucial and
welcome. Over the years the Internet, technology and offline trusted family
brands have stepped up to the plate to help design programs, materials and
resources, provide expertise and distribute them to their communities online
and offline. Their approaches are as varied as their businesses. And our
children are safer and our parents better informed because of their
involvement.
Offline and online resources and intervention points tying
the schools together with industry and community organizations, as well as the
families they serve, must be developed and adopted. We need a cybersafety
ecosystem that addresses the most common as well as the most serious risks, and
we can continue to look to the
technology, entertainment, device and software manufacturers, service providers
and Internet industry as advisors for their valuable help.
OPENING
STATEMENT
Defining the
Cyberbullying Problem[1]
We can’t address a problem until it is defined. While there
are several attempts to define “cyberbullying” as more than “you’ll know it
when you see it,” WiredSafety defines it as when minors use digital technology
as a weapon to hurt another minor. We have been doing this since 1995, longer
than any other group, and find that this definition is practical, realistic,
and separates adult cyberharassment from minor-to-minor attacks. To meet
WiredSafety’s definition of cyberbullying, the actions must be intentional, minor-to-minor
and must use some type of digital technology (cell phones, Internet, social
networks, gaming devices, IM, email, images, YouTube, virtual worlds/games,
etc.). The actions can range from a one-time serious threat to repeated and
unwanted insults, can be conducted as direct one-to-one attacks (direct
cyberbullying), postings intended to be viewed by many (indirect cyberbullying)
or schemes designed to set up the victim and have someone else do their dirty
work (parents when the text bill arrives, Facebook when false reports are made
to them, etc.).
Cyberbullying is growing in epidemic proportions- just ask
any middle school teacher, counselor or principal. Over the last two years the
number of kids experiencing cyberbullying has increased by more than 30% with
attacks becoming increasingly more hateful and vicious. It is also starting earlier and earlier as
first and second graders are getting online and stealing virtual world and
online games points and passwords from their friends and classmates.
However, children’s’ motives and methods change as they get
older and often by gender. Boys tend to use technology tools and infiltrate
accounts (hack) or threaten their targets, while girls tend to use social
exclusion and reputational attacks. Unlike in face-to-face bullying, size and
gender are often irrelevant: girls cyberbully boys, boys cyberbully girls,
smaller kids cyberbully the big tough ones. Technology levels all playing
fields. As a result, the only way to
tackle the problem of cyberbullying is to combine all stakeholders and to be as
inventive as children who cyberbully. In short, we need to find what works and
seek solutions everywhere, from everyone. We have to think outside of the box.
Educating Students to Stop Cyberbullying
Industry has an important stake in both keeping children and
teens safe online and educating parents and their communities. Fortunately,
leaders and newcomers alike are interested, involved and generous in sharing
their expertise, funding and access. I founded and run WiredSafety, a charity
that began its work in 1995 through its unpaid and loosely-organized volunteers
by rating websites and helping victims of cyberabuse and cybercrime online; in
15 years there is little we haven’t encountered, but cyberbullying and
cyberharassment prevention and help is one of our core missions. When I wrote
StopCyberbullying.org several years ago as a joint project with WiredSafety, it
quickly became the most popular cyberbullying awareness site online. Familes,
schools and communities needed help grappling with this growing problem, and
StopCyberbullying.org delivered what they needed.
This September, WiredSafety and I will release the
StopCyberbullying Toolkit I authored in time to help students and educators
headed back-to-school. The Toolkit contains $1 million worth of animations,
computer games, lesson plans and classroom activities, videos, posters,
coloring sheets and worksheets, guides, tip lists and community campaigns for
educators, parents, school administrators, guidance counselors, school resource
officers and community policing agents, parent teacher organizations and K-12
students. It is a single free downloadable resource for US schools that can be
customized to address local and regional concerns and students with special
needs. How can a million dollar resource be developed and distributed for free
without government funding? We turned to the industry for help and they
responded in droves.
Microsoft, Facebook, MySpace and LG Phones joined as
platinum sponsors. AOL, Procter & Gamble, Spectorsoft, myYearbook, KidZui,
Build-A-Bear Workshop and others also joined as sponsors. The Girl Scouts of
the USA, National Crime Prevention Council, ADL, Rachel Simmons, Michele Borba,
Bonnie Bracey, Art Wolinsky, Dr. Deanna Guy, Dr. Tom Biller, Teenangels and
Tweenangels, Cynthia Logan, Debbie Johnston, Chris Hansen, XBox, Disney, WebKinz, Zynga, Yahoo!,
Nickelodeon, MTV, Pantilla Amiga, Adobe, Unity, Pace University, McAfee,
Verizon, Nokia, MiniClip, Candystand (FunTank), Dolphin Entertainment, Hearst,
Conde Nast, Seventeen Magazine, ToysRUs, Readers Digest, People Magazine, YouSendIt,
the Child Safety Research and Innovation Center, WiredTrust, Marvel and vast
numbers of others contributing expertise, support and in-kind to help create and
distribute this multi-stakeholder resource with the best available content and
activities available.
The charity I run in volunteer-capacity, WiredSafety, also
works to bring together all stakeholders through summits, conferences and
events sponsored by industry leaders. The first International Stop Cyberbullying
Summit was hosted by WiredSafety in 2008 and Verizon’s Chairman and CEO, Ivan
Seidenberg, delivered the luncheon speech to explain how committed Verizon is
to stopping cyberbullying. Since then, they have been important leaders in the
industry and brought together other stakeholders to help address the problem.
LG Phone and Nokia are becoming engaged in cybersafety messaging and educating
the parents who buy their products for their children.
Many other industry players have joined forced with us as well as worked on
their own to create programs and raise awareness about cyberbullying. For example:
·
Facebook is developing a cyberbullying and
harassment page in its safety section to teach parents, teens and users of all
ages how to avoid becoming a victim of cyberbullying or being seen as a
cyberbully. They have revised their privacy settings to help keep cyberbullies
from abusing users’ information and posing as them. (The more a network
authenticates a user, the less likely cyberbullying can gain ground.) Recently, Facebook partnered with the
National Parent Teacher Association to help deliver cyberbullying and other
programs to parents at the local level and share wonderful resources and
information from the National PTA with others on Facebook. They have also
committed the help of their five chosen safety advisory board members
(including WiredSafety).
·
McAfee partnered with Facebook to provide free long-term
trial security software products to all
Facebook users. By using a good security product, cyberbullies can be locked
out of computers, devices and accounts.
·
ToysRUs is partnering with me and WiredSafety’s
Tweenangels, WiredMoms to develop
information for parents about different interactive toys and devices and how to
make the right choice for their children. This will involve in-store
information, online tutorials and content, and training and engagement of their
employees, as well as Tweenangel and WiredMoms reviews of their favorite
products.
·
XBox and Microsoft have developed the Pact, a
contract for parents and their children that addresses time spent playing games
and using media and rules. The Pact can be customized for each family and each
child. They have also created an advisory board that includes one of our
Teenangels and myself.
·
MTV’s A Thin Line campaign started with a survey
on teens and young adult practices and risks related to sexting and
cyberbullying. A documentary program on the consequences of sexting for both
those taking the nude picture and those forwarding it was broadcast with a wide
viewership. The athinline.org site engages young people and challenges them to
take charge. It informs them what to do when they encounter cyberbullying, how
to respect themselves and others and how to tell when their actions and those
of others have “crossed the line.” They address cyberspying by friends and
romantic partners and the right of privacy.
·
Seventeen Magazine has announced a large
campaign to activate and empower youth especially girls and young women, to
tackle cyberbullies and step up when they see others being harmed online. I
will be working with them on this campaign, as will my Teenangels
·
Liz
Claiborne expanded its free dating abuse campaign and curricula to include digital
dating abuse, asking me to create that segment of the curricula
(loveisnotabuse.org).
·
Taser International is creating cybersafety and
cyberbullying training and resources for members of law enforcement using their
certified trainers. They are also helping develop resources for local law
enforcement agencies and community policing agents to use in delivering
programs to their communities on cybersafety and cyberbullying. Having learned
about the concerns parents and the law enforcement community had addressing
distracted driving risks and cyberbullying and other cell phone-related abuses,
Taser developed a cell phone and in-car technology to prevent driver cell phone
and other distractions and to give parents better control and ability to
supervise their children’s cell phone activities, including prohibiting the
sharing of “sext” images and receipt of phone calls from strangers. The two
products will be released this year and are part of a broader campaign to
address risks to our families.
·
Micorsoft Window funded a comprehensive
cybersafety and cyberbullying awareness and educational initiative for the Girl
Scouts of the USA entitled “Let Me Know” or “LMK” developed by me using our
Congressionally-honored Teenangels program as the model. (This is intended to
serve the 2 million plus members of Girl Scouts.)
·
The gaming companies, such as Lego, FunTank
(Candystand.com), Zynga, Disney, Nickelodeon, and Nintendo are developing
technologies and methods to better protect their users of all ages.
Specifically, Nickelodeon is teaching parents and young users how to use games
and online networks in safer ways and to avoid being the target of a
cyberbully. Zynga (of Farmville and Mafia Wars fame) is developing safety
messaging on game bullying , security and safety with WiredSafety and with me.
Nintendo added parental controls to its DSi to help parents better address
their concerns.
·
Disney uses its TV programming and product
messaging to teach safer web surfing and cyberbullying prevention, including on
its netbooks and Club Penguin. Disney has created a corps of kids who act as
“secret agents” to Club Penguin to spot cyberbullying and other code of conduct
violations in the game. I worked with them on a segment of HGTV’s Designing
Spaces where I appeared helping a Florida parent understand the best way to
create a “cybersafe” room for her son and together with Teenangels in 1998
helped design Toowtown’s safety features.
·
The community approach, where the millions of
users are engaged in looking out for themselves and others, is becoming more
robust and filters adopted by Build-A-Bear Workshop help prevent their younger
users of buildabearville.com from targeting each other. They partnered with us
in StopCyberbullying month last year, offering in-store materials for parents
and pledges for children and added a “stop, block and tell!” move in their game
to help make cyberbullying awareness fun. They are founding members of the
StopCyberbullying Coaltiion and Maxine herself blogs to her millions of fans
about what parents need to know to keep their kids safer.
·
KidZui is delivering our Sumo-Wrestler Panda
Cybersafety animations, teaching children how to avoid and respond to cyberbullying.
·
AOL is heavily involved in supporting mom
digital literacy and awareness and is a sponsor of WiredMoms, WiredSafety’s mom
group with more than 70,000 followers on Twitter (@wiredmom and @wiredmoms)
·
Cisco commissioned us to create cybersafety
guides for kids, tweens, teens and parents for promotion on their sites and
other sites online.
·
Ceridian and IBM commissioned me to create a
tour of the teens’ Internet for parents in video and podcast/audio formats as
an employee benefit for IBM employees worldwide and
US military families.
·
Microsoft sponsored the development of the Alex
Wonder Kid CyberDetective Agency Bootcamp Computer Game, teaching tweens how to
identify and address cyberbullying as well as our first Marvel Internet Superheroes Comic on cyberbullying.
·
In 2004, Marvel donated an exclusive license to
use Spiderman, The Incredible Hulk and others in their Superhero studio in
comics offering cybersafety, security and digital technology-related issues.
·
Adobe donates expertise to us on special-needs
accessibility to allow for adaptation of cybersafety materials and resources
for the families of special-needs children and the children themselves.
·
Google and Yahoo! support public service
messaging and search promotions to select Internet child safey advocacy groups.
·
Oracle operates Think.com, a popular educational
resource for educators on digital use and empowerment.
Socially Safe Seal
Finally, many general audience industry leaders have applied
for and will soon receive the Socially Safe Best Practices Seal offered by
WiredTrust. To earn a Socially Safe Best Practices Seal, companies must
demonstrate, among other things, that they provide cyberbullying training for
their moderators and addresscyberbullying risks through programs and policies.
The Socially Safe Kids Seal, designed exclusively for tween and preteen
networks, must additionally comply with COPPA, and deliver materials to parents and schools, as
well as resources directed to their preteen audiences. WiredTrust is delivering
training and certification programs for moderators and, together with privacy
and security think tank experts, will launch Pathway, a screening and moderation technology for use by networks,
game sites and technology providers to help monitor their services and deliver
a safer environment and experience. WiredTrust was created to deliver quality
risk-management advice and best practices expertise to the Internet, online
game and digital technology provider industries. It professionalizes safety and
best practices.
This new approach of branding safety and best practices
works because, in addition to being good for communities, families and schools,
keeping all users, especially children safer is also good for business. Trusted
brand names and responsible newer companies recognize these opportunities and
their responsibilities to their customers, users and the community.
A representative of Google, while speaking at one of our
StopCyberbullying Coalition events, stated that creating safer networks is “an
issue of competition.” If your competitors are helping make things safer, you
have to as well. That was welcomed news.
But while it may be a competitive advantage to make your
networks and technologies safer, it also makes sens to join forces with and
cooperate with your competition and all industry players to create safer online
environments and better prepared young people and parents. An example on how
they are working together for the good of all Internet and digital technology
users, is our StopCyberbullying Coalition. The StopCyberbullying Coalition is a
multi-stakeholder group organized by WiredSafety and run by me to bring
together all viewpoints and expertise to tackle this growing problem from all
perspectives. Without the creativity, access, distribution channels and support
of the above- mentioned companies and
many more, non-profits, schools and families would not have the help they need
to address cyberbullying, cyberhate and the harassment of minors in the digital
world.
CONCLUSION
Thank you for including my testimony on this critically
important issue for our nations’ youth.
Cyberbullying is reaching epidemic proportions, touching kids at every age
and grade level. Thankfully many within
industry, schools and communities have begun to answer the call to provide
training programs, materials, and educational efforts to “Stop Cyberbullying”. I stand ready to answer any questions the
Subcommittee may have and provide additional information and offer the support
of both WiredSafety and its thousands of volunteers and my best practices
consulting firm, WiredTrust.
APPENDIX TO TESTIMONY OF PARRY AFTAB, ESQ.
SNAPSHOT OF U.S. MINORS ONLINE AND
CYBERBULLYING
It
is estimated that approximately 93% of minors in the Unites States 10 and older
access the Internet either from home, schools, community centers and libraries
or from some newer Internet-capable device. This is up more than fifteen-fold
since 1996, when only 6 million U.S. minors were online. Now our children are
using cell phones with video and camera features as well as Internet and
text-capability, iTouches and iPads with cell phone-like features, interactive
gaming devices (such as XBox and Sony Playstation 3) with voice-over-Internet ,
webcams and live chat features, handheld devices with Internet, Bluetooth and
other remote-communication technology (such as DS and DSi), community
broadcasts like Twitter and social networking profiles (such as Facebook, MySpace and myYearbook) where they
can share their thoughts, when they last brushed their teeth, and anything else
they want the world (or their closest friends) to know.
Fifteen
years ago, when our volunteers first began helping victims of cyberbullying and
cyberharassment things were easier. There was one way to access the Internet –
a computer with a slow dial-up modem. The Internet was too rare and access to
expensive for kids and teens to use and “central locations[2]”
where parents could oversee their kids’ surfing made sense. But this has
changed radically over these few short years. Now our kids and teens have more
power in their backpacks, pockets and purses than large corporations had a few
years ago. They have “apps” for everything, change their status on Facebook,
share pictures on Flickr, Tweet, upload videos on YouTube, send thousands of
texts (and sometimes “sexts”) and live out-loud online.
Now, instead of looking
over our children’s shoulders when they are connected, we have to teach our
children to use the "filter between their ears" and exercise good
judgment and care when using any interactive device wherever they are and
however they are connected. While teaching parents how to supervise their
children online was a challenge, teaching children to "ThinkB4uClick"
is much harder.
When I was growing up (in the days before electricity and indoor plumbing, when we had to walk up hill, both ways in blizzards to get to school), parents used to blame us for not behaving. We were disciplinary problems. Now pediatric neuro-psychologists tell us that preteens and teens are hardwired, through immature brain development, to be unable to control their impulses at this age. Either way, we recognize that preteens and teens take risks, don't appreciate the consequences of their actions and act before they think. This puts them at risk for many things, including, but not limited to being cyberbullied or being the cyberbully. (Often the only difference between the two is which clicked the mouse last.)
In
middle school and elementary school, we call it “cyberbullying.” High schoolers
think that “cyberbullying” is a middle school thing and they are too mature for
it. They call the same activities that constitute “cyberbullying” “digital
drama” or “digital abuse.” [3]
Statistics and a Snapshot of Cyberbullying
Trends
A few years ago, I visited schools around the U.S. doing
presentations to students in elementary, middle and high schools. During each
presentation, I asked students if they had been cyberbullied. Instead of asking
that way, since each student defines cyberbullying in different ways, I listed
the kinds of things that constitute cyberbullying, asking if they had
experienced any of those. (They included having someone access your profile,
posting something hateful and then changing your password so you can’t remove
it, passing vicious rumors, posing as you and saying mean things to your
friends or breaking up with your girlfriend or boyfriend, etc.) I spoke to a
total of more than 44,000 middle school students and no matter where I went in
the U.S.; I never found less than 85% of the students reporting that they had
been cyberbullied at least once. In a much smaller poll, 70% of the students
polled admitted to having cyberbullied someone else at least once. Students are
inventive and cyberbullying is often a “crime of convenience, “committed when
they are bored, jealous, vengeful or looking for an audience.
Cyberbullying spans all digital technologies, from cell
phones where students may grab an unattended cellphone and reprogram the
victim’s best friend's or romantic interest’s number to their cell number. Then
they send a mean text message that would come up as the best friend or a
break-up message ostensibly from their girlfriend or boyfriend. The victim
would blame their friend and two students are victimized for the price of one
cyberbullying tactic. (They should spend half the time studying as they do
dreaming up these kinds of schemes!)
Key Statistics on Cyberbullying from
StopCyberbullying.org and Teenangels
·
85% of middle schoolers polled reported being
cyberbullied at least once.
·
70% of teens polled reported cyberbullying
someone else.
·
86% of elementary school students share their
password with their friend(s).
70% of teens polled said they share their
password with their boyfriend/girlfriend or best friend. (Sharing your password
is the digital generation’s equivalent of a “friendship ring.”)
·
Cyberbullying starts in 2nd - 3rd
grade and peaks in 4th grade and again in 7th-9th grade.
·
Only 5% of middle schoolers would tell their
parents if they were cyberbullied.
·
Middle schoolers have identified 63 different
reasons not to tell their parents.
·
Teens have identified 71 different ways to
cyberbully someone.
·
Cellphones are used 38% of the time in
cyberbullying incidents.
·
Social networks are used 39% of the time in
cyberbullying incidents.
·
Password theft or misuse accounts for 27% of
cyberbullying. (There is
overlap between this and social networking
cyberbullying.)
·
The number of cyberbullying and sextbullying
(when sexting incidents are used to intentionally destroy a minor’s reputation
and self-esteeem) is increasing rapidly.
·
52% of boys in high school reported having seen
at least one nude image of a classmate.
·
1000 Wisconsin teens identified cyberbullying as
a risk or a serious risk.
·
An equal percentage of boys and girls admit to
taking and sharing a sext of themselves.
·
71% of girls use their webcan in their bedroom,
and 21% regret something they did on a webcam.
·
5% of 10 – 12 yr olds polled admitted to taking
and sharing a sexually provocative or nude photo of themselves.
·
Within a 48 hour period, more than 200,000
myYearbook users took a pledge against cyberbullying.
What are the
Different Types of Cyberbullies?
It is impossible
to change behavior when no one understands what is behind it. Cyberbullying
occurs for the same reasons schoolyard bullying occurs. It also occurs by
accident when students are careless about cyber communications. It might come
from impulsive and thoughtless reactions to something that has upset the
“cyberbully.” They may be defending themselves and each other from offline
bullies or other cyberbullies. Lumping them all together will lead nowhere,
fast.
Every
Type of Cyberbullying Requires a Different Response and Method of Prevention
The four types of cyberbullies include:
·
The Vengeful Angel
·
The Power-Hungry ( or Revenge of the Nerds sub-type)
·
The Mean Girls
·
The
Inadvertent Cyberbully
“The Vengeful Angel”: In this type of cyberbullying, the
cyberbully doesn’t see themselves as a bully at all. They see themselves as righting wrongs, or protecting themselves or
others from the “bad guy” they are now victimizing. The Vengeful Angel
cyberbully often gets involved trying to protect a friend who is being bullied or cyberbullied. They generally work alone,
but may share their activities and motives with their close friends and others they perceive as being
victimized by the person they are cyberbullying.
Vengeful Angels need to know that no one should try and take justice
into their own hands. They need to understand
that few things are clear enough to understand, and that fighting bullying with
more bullying only makes things
worse. They need to see themselves as bullies, not the do-gooder they think
they are. It also helps to address the
reasons they lashed out in the first place. If they sense injustices, maybe
there really are injustices. Instead
of just blaming the Vengeful Angel, solutions here also require that the situation
be reviewed to see what can be done to address the underlying problem. Is there
a place to report bullying or cyberbullying?
Can that be done anonymously? Is there a peer counseling group that handles these
matters? What about parents and school administrators. Do they ignore bullying
when it occurs, or do they take it seriously? The more methods we can give
these kinds of cyberbullies to use official channels to right wrongs, the less often they will try to take justice into their
own hands.
The “Power-Hungry” and “Revenge of the
Nerds”: Just as their
schoolyard counterparts, some cyberbullies want
to exert their authority, show that they are powerful enough to make others do
what they want and some want to control others with fear. Sometimes they just
don’t like the other kid. These are no different than the offline tough schoolyard
bullies,
except
for their method. Power-Hungry cyberbullies usually need an audience. It may be
a small audience of their friends or those within their circle at school. Often
the power they feel when only cyberbullying someone is not enough to feed their
need to be seen as powerful and intimidating. They often brag about their
actions. They
want a reaction, and without one may escalate their activities to get one.
Interestingly enough, a sub type of the Power-Hungry cyberbully is often
the victim of typical offline bullying. They
may be female, or physically smaller, the ones picked on for not being popular
enough, or cool enough. They may have
greater technical skills. Some people call this type the “Revenge of the Nerds”
cyberbully. It is their intention to
frighten or embarrass their victims. And they are empowered by the anonymity of the Internet and digital
communications and the fact that they never have to confront their victim. They may act tough online, but are not
tough in real life. They are often not a bully but “just playing one on
TV.”
This
kind of cyberbullying usually takes place one-on-one and the cyberbully often
keeps their activities secret from their
friends. If they share their actions, they are doing it only with others they
feel would be sympathetic. The rarely appreciate the seriousness of
their actions, and often resort to cyberbullying-by proxy. Because of this and their tech skills, it can be the most
dangerous of all cyberbullying.
Power-Hungry
cyberbullies often react best when they know that few things are ever anonymous
online. We leave a trail of cyber-breadcrumbs behind us wherever we go in
cyberspace. And, with the assistance of a law enforcement or legal subpoena, we
can almost always find the cyber-abusers and cybercriminals in real life. Shining a bright light on
their activities helps too. When they are exposed, letting the school community know about their exposure helps prevent
copycat cyberbullying.
Helping them to realize the magnitude of their activities is also helpful. Often their activities rise to the criminal level. The more this type of cyberbully understands the legal consequences of their actions, the more they think about their actions.
Helping them to realize the magnitude of their activities is also helpful. Often their activities rise to the criminal level. The more this type of cyberbully understands the legal consequences of their actions, the more they think about their actions.
“Mean Girls”: The type of
cyberbullying occurs when the cyberbully is bored or looking for entertainment.
It is largely ego-based and the most immature of all cyberbullying types.
Typically, in Mean Girls bullying situations, the cyberbullies are female. They
may be bullying other girls (most frequently) or boys (less frequently).
Mean Girls
cyberbullying is usually done, or at least planned, in a group, either
virtually or together in one room. It may
occur from a school library or a slumber party or from the family room of
someone after school. This kind of
cyberbullying requires an audience. The cyberbullies in a Mean Girls situation
want others to know who they are and
that they have the power to cyberbully others. This kind of cyberbullying grows
when fed by group admiration, cliques or by the silence of others who stand by
and let it happen. It quickly dies if
they don’t get the entertainment value they are seeking.
The most effective tool in handling a Mean Girls cyberbullying case is
blocking controls. Block them, block all alternate screen names and force them to go
elsewhere for their sick entertainment. In addition, if threatened with loss of
their Facebook or AIM accounts, they wise up fast!
In all cases of which I am aware, the sexting and cyberbullying-suicides
and attempted suicides in the US involved Mean Girls cyberbullies.
They
may feel hurt, or angry because of a communication sent to them, or something
they have seen online. And they tend to respond in anger or frustration. They don’t
think before clicking “send.”
Sometimes, while experimenting in role-playing
online, they may send cyberbullying communications or target someone without
understanding how serious this could be. They do it for the heck of it “Because
I Can.”
They do it for the fun of it. They may also do it to one of their friends,
joking around. But their friend may not recognize that it is another friend or may take
it seriously. They tend to do this when alone, and are mostly surprised when
someone accuses them of cyberabuse.
They also may be careless, typing too fast and
beung unclear or leaving our crucial words, like “not.” They may send a message
to the wrong person or hurt someone by accident.
Education plays an
important role in preventing Inadvertent Cyberbullying. Teaching them to
respect others and to be
sensitive to their needs is the most effective way of dealing with this kind of
cyberbully. Teaching them to Take5! is an
easy way to help them spot potentially bullying behavior before it’s too late.
Methods of
Cyberbullying
Kids have always tormented each other. Just think about Lord of the Flies. Now with the help of
cybertechnologies, sadly, they are doing it more and more online, using mobile
phones and interactive games. I spend as much time protecting kids from each
other online these days as from cyberpredators.
What is
Cyberbullying?: Cyberbullying is any cyber-communication or publication
posted or sent by a minor online, by instant messenger, e-mail, website, diary
site, online profile, interactive game, handheld device, cell phone or other
interactive device that is intended to frighten, embarrass, harass or otherwise
target another minor. If there aren’t minors on both sides of the
communication, it is considered cyberharassment, not cyberbullying. A one-time
rude or insulting communication sent to a minor is generally not considered
cyberbullying. Cyberbullying needs to be repeated, or a threat of bodily harm,
or a public posting designed to hurt, embarrass or otherwise target a child.
How does it work?: There
are two kinds of cyberbullying: direct attacks (messages sent to your kids
directly) and cyberbullying by proxy (using others to help cyberbully the
victim, either with or without the accomplice’s knowledge). Because
cyberbullying by proxy often gets adults involved in the harassment, it is much
more dangerous.
Direct
Attacks
1. Instant Messaging/E-mail/Text Messaging/Inbox
or PM Harassment
2. Kids may send hateful or threatening
messages to other kids without realizing that unkind or threatening messages
are hurtful and very serious.
3. Warning/Report Abuse/Notify Wars—Many
Internet Service Providers offer a way of reporting or “telling on” a user who
is saying inappropriate things. Kids often engage in “warning wars” which can
lead to kicking someone offline for a period of time. While this should be a
security tool, kids sometimes use the Warn/Notify/Report Abuse buttons as a
game or prank.
4. A kid/teen may create a screen name that is
very similar to another kid’s name. The name may have an additional “i” or one
less “e.” It might use a lowercase “L” instead of the number “1.” They may use
this name to say inappropriate things to other users while posing as the other
person.
a. Text wars, text-bombs, or text attacks occur
when kids gang up on the victim, sending thousands of text messages to the
victim's cellphone or other mobile device. The victim is then faced with a huge
cellphone bill and angry parents.
b. Kids send death threats using IM and text
messaging as well as photos/videos (see below).
Stealing
Passwords
a. A kid may steal another child’s password and
begin to chat with other people, pretending to be the other kid. He/she may say
mean things that offend and anger this person’s friends or even strangers.
Meanwhile, the others won’t know it is not really that person they are talking to.
b. A kid may also use another kid’s password to
change his/her profile to include sexual, racist, and inappropriate things that
may attract unwanted attention or offend people.
c. A kid often steals the password and locks
the victim out of their own account.
d. Once the password is stolen, hackers may use
it to hack into the victim’s computer.
e. A stolen password can allow the cyberbully
to steal points, loot, and game “gold.”
Blogs
Blogs are online journals. They are a fun way for kids and teens to post
messages for all of their friends to see. However, kids sometimes use these
blogs to damage other kids’ reputations or invade their privacy. For example,
in one case, a boy posted a bunch of blogs about his breakup with his
ex-girlfriend, explaining how she destroyed his life and calling her degrading
names. Their mutual friends read about this and criticized her. She was
embarrassed and hurt, all because another kid posted mean, private, and false
information about her. Sometimes kids set up a blog or profile page pretending
to be their victim and saying things designed to humiliate them.
Websites
a.
Children
used to tease each other in the playground; now they do it on websites. Kids
sometimes create websites that may insult or endanger another child. They
create pages specifically designed to insult another kid or group of people.
b.
They select and register domain names designed
to inflame or otherwise hurt their victims.
c. Kids also post other kids’ personal
information and pictures, putting those people at a greater risk of being
contacted or found.
Sending
Pictures Through E-mail and Cellphones
a. There have been cases of teens sending mass
e-mails to other users that include nude or degrading pictures of other teens.
Once an e-mail like this is sent, it is passed around to hundreds of other
people within hours. There is no way of controlling where it goes.
b. Many of the newer cellphones allow kids to
send pictures to each other. The kids receive the pictures directly on their
phones and may send them to everyone in their address books. After viewing the
picture at a website, some kids have actually posted these often pornographic
pictures online for anyone to see, spread, or download.
c. Kids often take a picture of someone in a
locker room, bathroom, or dressing room and post it online or send it to others
on cellphones.
Internet
Polling
Who’s hot? Who’s not? Who is the biggest slut in the sixth grade? These
types of questions run rampant on the Internet polls, all created by yours
truly—kids and teens. Such questions are often very offensive to others and are
yet another way that kids can bully other kids online.
Interactive
Gaming
Many kids today are playing interactive games on gaming devices such as
Xbox 360 and Sony PlayStation 3, Nintendo DS, and Sony PSP. These gaming
devices may allow students to communicate with anyone they find themselves
matched with in an online game or people within a certain defined physical
area. Sometimes the kids verbally abuse the other kids, using threats and lewd
language. Sometimes they take it further, locking them out of games, passing
false rumors about them, or hacking into their accounts.
Sending
Malicious Code
Many kids will send viruses, spyware, and hacking programs to their
victims. They do this to either destroy their computers or spy on their victim.
Trojan horse programs allow the cyberbully to remotely control their victim’s
computer and can be used to erase the victim's hard drive.
Sending Porn
and Other Junk E-mail and IMs
Cyberbullies often will sign up their victims for e-mail and IM
marketing lists, lots of them, especially porn sites. When the victim receives
thousands of e-mails from pornographers, their parents usually get involved,
either blaming them (assuming they have been visiting porn sites) or making
them change their e-mail or IM address.
Impersonation/Posing
Posing as the victim, the cyberbully can do considerable damage. While
posing as the victim, they may post a provocative message in a hate
group’s chatroom or on their forum pages, inviting an attack against the
victim, often giving the name, address, and telephone number of the victim to
make the hate group’s job easier. They often also send a message to someone
saying hateful or threatening things while masquerading as the victim. They may
also alter a message really from the victim, making it appear that they have
said nasty things or shared secrets with others.
Social
Networking Attacks
Most teens (and many preteens) are using social networks such as MySpace
and Facebook. They build a profile and share whatever they want to share with
the world or their close friends. They post pictures and videos (especially on
video networks like YouTube), pass rumors, exclude those they want to target,
create quizzes and polls, and use anonymous networks (such as JuicyCampus.com)
or applications such as Honesty Box to attack their victims. They impersonate
their victims, take over their accounts, or report them to their school,
parents, or the police.
Aside from cellphones, social networking is the technology of choice for
cyberbullying and harassment.
Misappropriation
of Cellphones
While the predominant method used to cyberbully someone through a
cellphone is texting and prank calling, students are lifting an unattended
cellphone and reprogramming it to do their dirty work.
Cyberbullying
by Proxy (Third Party Cyberharassment or Cyberbullying)
Often people who misuse the Internet to target others do it using accomplices.
These accomplices, unfortunately, are often unsuspecting. They know they are
communicating irate or provocative messages, but don’t realize that they are
being manipulated by the real cyberharasser or cyberbully. That’s the beauty of
this type of scheme. The attacker merely prods the issue by creating
indignation or emotion on the part of others, and can then sit back and let
others do their dirty work. Then, when legal action or other punitive actions
are taken against the accomplice, the real attacker can claim that they never
instigated anything and no one was acting on their behalf. They claim innocence
and blame their accomplices, unwitting or not; their accomplices have no legal
leg to stand on.
It’s brilliant and very powerful. It is also one of the most dangerous
kinds of cyberharassment or cyberbullying. Children do this often using AOL,
MSN, or another ISP as their “proxy” or accomplice. When they engage in a
“notify” or “warning” war, they are using this method to get the ISP to view
the victim as the provocateur. A notify or warning war is when one child
provokes another until the victim lashes back. When they do, the real attacker
clicks the warning or notify button on the text screen. This captures the
communication and flags it for the ISP’s review. If the ISP finds that the
communication violated their terms of service agreement (which most do), they
may take action. Some accounts allow several warnings before formal action is
taken, but the end result is the same. The ISP does the attacker’s dirty work
when they close or suspend the real victim’s account for a terms of service
violation. Most knowledgeable ISPs know this and are careful to see if the
person being warned is really being set up.
Sometimes children use the victim’s own parents as unwitting
accomplices. They provoke the victim and, when the victim lashes back, they
save the communication and forward it to the victim's parents. The parents
often believe what they read and, without having evidence of the prior
provocations, think that their own child “started it.”
This works just as easily in a school disciplinary environment.
Students may not understand that their attacks, if designed to hurt
someone’s reputation, may be defamatory and subject them to discipline,
lawsuits, and in some cases harassment charges. They may not understand that
they can be tracked quite easily most of the time and held accountable for
their actions. They may not understand that their actions may be a terms of
service violation and cost them (or their family) their online accounts. They
may repeat rumors and take action based on false information, and then find
themselves facing liability when the person who started it all hides behind
them. They should know that repeating lies, even if you read them online, is no
excuse under the law.
WiredSafety advises not to respond to cyberbullying. So, it is important
that we caution to all who believe things without confirming their accuracy not
to confuse silence or failure to defend or rebut any rumors with an admission
of guilt or confirmation that a lie told by someone is true. Sometimes silence
is smarter, especially when the real fight may not occur online at all. The
smarter ones don’t fight their battles in public online, not when defamation,
cyberbullying or harassment is involved.
Just a reminder to teach students to thinkB4uClick. Otherwise they have
become what they say they are fighting. They have become a cyberharasser or
cyberbully themselves. Teach them not to be used. Teach them to use their
heads.
The
Problem With Some Prominent Surveys
Major survey companies and educational institutions have studied
cyberbullying. While they all conclude that cyberbullying is a serious and
growing problem, they (in our opinion) under-report the problem. It’s not their
fault. It’s the nature of how surveys with minors are conducted. Most take
place after the parents are asked for their permission to survey their kids.
Since there are 57 different reasons identified by students for why they would
not tell their parents if targeted by a cyberbully, it is unlikely that they
will be candid with the surveyor in their parents’ presence or after their
parents are informed about the survey.
The second problem with the surveys is that they ask, “Have you been
cyberbullied?,” without defining what they mean. Like “obscenity,” which,
according to a former U.S. Supreme Court Justice, “you know it when you see
it,” it’s easier for people to spot than to define. But many students think
that harassment and cruelty online comes with the territory, and unless it’s a
death threat or text-bomb (see Talk the Talk), it’s not cyberbullying. For any
survey to be effective, it needs to define situations that constitute
cyberbullying and ask the students if they have ever been involved in one of
those situations.
Interestingly, students are more likely to own up to being a cyberbully
than a victim.
A
Conspiracy to Conceal It
WiredSafety’s surveys reflect that only 5% of students would tell their
parents if they were being targeted by a cyberbully. When Teenangels conducted
a survey of their own, they learned that less than 25% of the students would
tell anyone if they were being cyberbullied.
Why? The answer is different for parents than another trusted adult.
Parents have the power to make their lives miserable. They can turn off the
Internet, take away cellphones, computers, and gaming devices, pick up the
phone and call other parents, the school, or their lawyers. They run too hot
and overreact, or too cold and underestimate the pain the cyberbully causes.
The students don’t want their parents to discover that they are not as
popular in school as hoped. They don’t want to look like they can’t take care
of themselves. They don’t want their parents to find out that they were doing
things they shouldn’t or to learn the information the cyberbully is threatening
to expose.
Parents might start monitoring or filtering everything, spying, or being
overly attentive to what the student is doing online. The parents may demand
passwords to all accounts and use them, confront the cyberbully or their
parents, call the police, or blow things out of proportion. The cyberbullying
may become the topic of discussion over the Thanksgiving table or the source of
teasing or bullying by siblings.
If their current or former friends were the cyberbullies, the victim,
interestingly, may try and protect them or avoid having them punished. They
don’t want to be termed a “tattletale” or have the cyberbully escalate their
actions because they “told.” They may have responded using inappropriate
language or threats of their own. The list goes on and on.
They are reluctant to share with their “friends” and not sure if the
cyberbully is one of those in whom they are confiding. With anonymous
cyberbullying they can’t be sure if the cyberbully is their best friend or
worst enemy. Friends are armed with their secrets and passwords and sometimes
the cyberbully poses as one of their friends. They don’t know where to turn or
whom to trust.
Trusting their teachers, guidance counselors, and school administrators
is a bit different. In this case, they worry that the school will refuse to get
involved. (This fear is often well-founded.) They fear their uninformed
involvement even more. When well-meaning school administrators get involved, they
often call everyone in and try to get to the bottom of things. This only makes
things worse and sets up the victim for more harassment from the cyberbully,
their friends, and everyone in the class who sees the victim as “squealing.”
Even when the school administrators do the right thing, it can backfire.
On a recent Tyra Banks Show, Parry met a young student who had reported her
classmates taking her picture with their cellphone while in the locker room at
school. (She and other girls were dancing in various stages of undress.) The
cyberbully threatened to post the pictures on Facebook and the girl panicked
and went to the principal, who promptly called in the girls and confiscated the
cellphone. The entire class turned on the victim, saying she had blown it all
out of proportion. She was victimized twice—once by the girls and again by the
class.
An interesting exercise for students is to ask them to see how many
reasons they can come up with why they wouldn’t tell their parents about being
cyberbullied. Parry has never gotten them to come up with more than 57
different reasons. See if you can beat her record and share the reasons you
find. They can be illuminating. If we understand why they don’t share this or
trust their parents, we can find ways to address their concerns and change this
pattern. We can also find ways to make sure that they trust guidance
counselors, teachers, and school administrators so they don’t have to face this
alone.
The challenge we all face is how we can intervene without feeding the
cyberbullies. There are no easy answers on this one, just some approaches that
have worked for others. An effective strategy is to get peer counselors
involved and create a cyberbullying taskforce for the school, including
students in crafting responses and consequences of cyberbullying activities.
Make sure you include the consequences for bystanders.
Whatever you do, do it carefully and thoughtfully. Ask the victim first
before you take any action other than those needed to protect them or others.
Remember, cyberbullying hurts. The first thing we need to do is address that
hurt. Bring in the guidance counselors to help. The more advance preparation
and planning the school does, the faster and better you can respond when these
things occur.
Starting Young - The Sumo Pandas
WiredSafety has created the Sumo Panda digital safety and cyberbullying
prevention program to help teach cybersafety to kids from kindergarten to grade
six. It uses a series of twelve short and cute Flash and Quicktime animations
of the Pandas, their friends and rivals – the Polar Bears from Polar Bear
Academy. Each animation is paired with a teaching kit that contains things like
lesson plans, activity
sheets,
coloring pages, pledges, and lesson certificates
Artemus and
his cousin, Precious Panda live in the Forest of Kind with their
families. Artemus and Precious attend Panda Elementary School with the
other animals in their forest and love to sumo wrestle in their spare time!
Like any other kid, they also love to play online. Too bad Artemus isn’t the
most cyber savvy and Precious often has to guide him to find the right path.
Unfortunately, Artemus is often influenced by his “friends” Herbert the panda
and Chops the pig who don’t always have his best interests at heart. Artemus is
also often the target of cyberbullying by his rivals, the Polar Bears from
Polar Bear Academy. But with the support of his true friends, especially
Precious, Artemus always learns important lessons in cybersafety by the end of
the day.
Teaching them the consequences of their actions, and that the real
“Men in Black” may show up at their front door sometimes helps too. Since many
cyberbullying campaigns include some form of hacking or password or identity
theft, serious laws are implicated. Law enforcement, including the FBI, might
get involved in these cases. Remind your students that they could easily be
implicated in a cyberbullying case commenced by one of their friends. (But be
careful, this may end up backfiring if the kids are intrigued by what would
happen if the FBI did knock on their door. It’s happened.)
But few cyberbullying campaigns can succeed without the complacency
and the often help of other kids. If no one votes at a cyber-bashing website,
the cyberbully’s attempts to humiliate the victim are thwarted. If no one
forwards a hateful or embarrassing e-mail, the cyberbully is left standing all
alone. It’s rarely fun to act out unless you can show off to someone who will
appreciate your antics. By denying the cyberbully an audience, the antics quickly
stop.
In addition, the “mean girls” cyberbullies need an audience. That’s
the reason they do it, to show everyone that they can. It reinforces their social status and
ranking. It reminds everyone who believes it that they can do anything they
want to anyone they want. Denying them their audience and ego fix takes the fun
out of cyberbullying. Hopefully they can then move on to something else a
little less destructive.
If we can help kids understand how much bullying hurts, how in many
cases (unlike the children’s chant) words can hurt
you, fewer may cooperate with the cyberbullies. They will think twice before
forwarding a hurtful IM or e-mail, or visiting a cyberbullying “vote for the
fat-girl” site, or allowing others to take videos or cell phone pictures of
personal moments or compromising poses of others. And, in addition to not
lending their efforts to continue the cyberbullying, if given an anonymous
method of reporting cyberbullying websites, profiles and campaigns, students
can help put an end to cyberbullying entirely. School administration, community
groups and even school policing staff can receive these anonymous tips and take
action quickly when necessary to shut down the site, profile or stop the
cyberbullying itself. They can even let others know that they won’t allow
cyberbullying by supporting the victim, making it clear that they won’t be used
to torment others and that they care about the feelings of others is key.
Martin Luther King, Jr. once said “In the end, we will remember not the words
of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”
We need to teach our students that silence, when others are being
hurt, is not acceptable. If they don’t allow the cyberbullies to use them to
embarrass or torment others, cyberbullying will quickly stop. It’s a tall task,
but a noble goal. And in the end, our students will be safer online and
offline. We will have helped create a generation of good cybercitizens,
controlling the technology instead of being controlled by it.
APPENDIX ON RESPONSES TO
MASSACHUSSET’S MIDDLE SCHOOL SURVEY OF 500 STUDENTS ON TEXTING - 2009
|
Student Survey - 770 Middle and
High School Wisconsin Students Winter 2010
|
||||||
|
What do you know about
cyberbullying?
|
||||||
|
|
What is your grade?
|
|
||||
|
Answer Options
|
6th
|
7th
|
8th
|
9th
|
10th
|
Response Percent
|
|
I don't know what it is.
|
15
|
5
|
4
|
33
|
34
|
11.8%
|
|
It's no big deal.
|
1
|
3
|
2
|
39
|
24
|
9.0%
|
|
I have heard about it on TV or in
magazines, but don't know much more.
|
4
|
17
|
17
|
63
|
42
|
18.6%
|
|
It happens in middle school only.
|
0
|
3
|
1
|
2
|
4
|
1.3%
|
|
It's when you say mean things
online, in a text or by IM.
|
11
|
55
|
64
|
194
|
120
|
57.7%
|
|
It's when you take a embarrassing
pic using a cell phone and send it to others to hurt someone.
|
11
|
47
|
64
|
144
|
70
|
43.6%
|
|
I have heard about someone in my
school or town that was cyberbullied.
|
5
|
26
|
20
|
74
|
29
|
20.0%
|
|
Friends of mine have been
cyberbullied, but I haven't.
|
4
|
17
|
7
|
35
|
16
|
10.3%
|
|
We've had cyberbullying incidents
in my school.
|
3
|
21
|
16
|
69
|
29
|
17.9%
|
|
I have seen cyberbullying messages
designed to hurt or embarrass someone else.
|
3
|
20
|
20
|
83
|
44
|
22.1%
|
|
I have cyberbullied others.
|
0
|
3
|
2
|
7
|
18
|
3.9%
|
|
I have said nasty things to others
online, but don't consider it cyberbullying.
|
0
|
4
|
14
|
29
|
22
|
9.0%
|
|
I have been cyberbullied by a
close friend.
|
1
|
9
|
4
|
23
|
13
|
6.5%
|
|
I have had someone steal my
password and pretend to be me.
|
0
|
14
|
13
|
40
|
24
|
11.8%
|
|
I have had someone cyberbully me
on Facebook.
|
0
|
5
|
4
|
18
|
14
|
5.3%
|
|
I have seen others cyberbullied on
Facebook.
|
2
|
9
|
7
|
64
|
28
|
14.3%
|
|
I should report cyberbullying to
the FBI.
|
0
|
20
|
5
|
20
|
8
|
6.9%
|
|
I know how to report cyberbullying
to Facebook and other sites.
|
3
|
18
|
20
|
51
|
24
|
15.1%
|
|
You can be arrested if you
cyberbully someone.
|
3
|
35
|
29
|
70
|
29
|
21.6%
|
|
Teens have committed suicide when
they were cyberbullied.
|
5
|
46
|
60
|
138
|
57
|
39.7%
|
|
I've cyberbullied someone with my
friends just for fun
|
0
|
1
|
6
|
20
|
12
|
5.1%
|
|
I have been harassed and
embarrassed by text messages sent by others
|
2
|
11
|
15
|
33
|
15
|
9.9%
|
[1] I
have attached information about cyberbullying, how it works and ways to address
it in the Appendix, along with my one-page bio.
[2]
Thirteen years ago, when I first wrote
the first book in the world on Internet safety for parents and told them to put
the computer in a “central location,” that made sense. It was a central point,
where parents could get involved and supervise their children's interactive
communications and surfing activities. Now, where they are connected through
handheld devices, cell phones and game boxes, it is no longer relevant.
[3] MTV’s wonderful multi-year campaign to
address cyberbullying, digital dating abuse and sexting risks was launched in
late 2009 and can be found at athinline.org. It explains the scope of the teen
and young adult issues. I serve as a member of its advisory board, along with
Casi Lumbra, one of my Teenangels.
