Finally, the beginning of closure for Carol Todd and Amanda's loved ones. Accused under arrest for sextorting Amanda Todd

I love Carol Todd. She is funny, kind, creative and cares deeply about kids and people facing adversity. I met her for the first time when both of us attended the dropping of C-13, Canada's sexting/revenge porn bill, at the invitation of the Prime Minister of Canada.

On that day she was overwhelmed. Many of the leading cyberbullying and child protection advocates form North America were there. But the media followed Carol, hanging on her every word. She rarely has a moment to herself. Amanda is always with her. And, Amanda is always with us.

We connected again not long thereafter. And became friends and partners in stopping pain. Carol does this from her heart. I worry that she will burn out or break down, but with the exception of some teary and quiet moments, she is incredibly strong. She is also tireless and devoted to her cause, which is supporting Amanda's cause and passions.

Both of us were troubled that the person who sextorted Amanda, by threatening to put her intimate picture online. (He followed through with that threat.) When we spent an entire week together in March, we talked often about how great it would be to find him.

She just texted me. He's caught!

Now, we'll all work to make sure that justice is done.

Sextbullying, when Cyberbullying Meets Sexting

Sextbullying (cyberbullying, using sexting images as a weapon): When young people target their peers with digital sexual attacks, they do it for one of two reasons – classic sexual exploitation (either through producing, viewing or sharing sexual images or through actual sexual acts) or to damage the reputation of someone they want to hurt. When they do it digitally to hurt someone, rather than for their own sexual titillation, it is a form of “cyberbullying”.

They may take a picture of another minor while in the locker room or while changing at a slumber party. They can hold a cell phone, digital camera of video camera over the top of a dressing room divider to shoot their victim undressed. They can shoot “up skirt” images by holding the video camera in a bag aimed upwards while standing near their victim. They can secretly (or openly) record their own sexual acts with this victim. They can point their webcams in a dorm room, after leaving to “give their roommate some privacy.” Or they can get hold of sexual or nude sexts that the victim took voluntarily and spread them to everyone in the offline or online community.

While the major thrust is destroying the reputation of their victim or getting them into trouble with parents or school authorities, the added risk is that these same materials make their way into the clutches of traditional sexual predators. They may also qualify as “child pornography” and everyone along the chain of production, distribution and possession can face serious felony charges and end up as registered sex offenders (in the US).

Whether the image was taken consensually by the minor and voluntarily shared or posted or taken secretly and used to blackmail them, the images are illegal and carry serious penalties for use or misuse, including for moderation staff and the network itself, if not handled carefully within the safe harbor laws of the applicable jurisdiction. 

#Sexting - what is it? How often does it occur?

“Sexting” is when someone takes a picture or video of themselves and shares it with someone using a cell phone. It was derived from the word “texting” but applies when they do the same thing using any other kind of digital technology such as a webcam, digital camera or digital video device. Sexting has been going on since at least 1998, when Parry Aftab learned of a middle school student who took sexual videos of herself to share with a boy she liked and wanted to date. Those images were posted on peer-to-peer networks in existence at that time and everyone in her school, neighborhood and community heard about or saw the video.

Since then, it has become more common. Some experts estimate that “sexting” among minors (under 18 years of age) involves roughly 20% of teen girls. (Among those sexually active, the number increases to 30% or more.) The truth is that no one knows how often it happens. Most of the sexual images teens share stay private. What we do know, based upon the research and work of Wiredsafety, is that:

·        Once teens are sexually intimate, it is common that the girl is asked to share at least one nude or sexual image or video with the boy;

·        Some teen girls will share a nude image with a boy they are seeing instead of being sexually intimate or to delay intimacy;

·        44% of high school boys polled by WiredSafety said they had seen at least one nude or sexual image of a female classmate;

·        10% of the high school boys polled by WiredSafety said they had sent a nude pic to a girl (often unsolicited);

·        Preteens often take nude pictures or pictures in their underwear to look older or more sophisticated;

·        Some teens think that by sending a nude or sexual image to a boy they like or boys they want to attract they stand a better chance of being asked out by them;

·        The image of a girl is often shared among boys, but moves faster among other students if it is sent by other girls to embarrass her;

·        Even if the boy never voluntarily shares the image with anyone else, their friends, siblings or parents may stumble across it when using or searching their devices;

·        These images are often taken in anger, when under the influence of drugs, alcohol or peer-pressure, or in desperation to please a partner;

·        Some boys have used knowledge of a girl having posed for a sexting or sexing image to extort them into taking more sexual pictures or engage in sex acts with them; and

·        Some adult men do the same, and teen sexting or sexing images may end up in predator teen photo galleries and shared among some registered sex offenders.

MTV’s A Thin Line campaign (for which Parry Aftab is an advisor) conducted a survey with Associated Press. They learned that young people who engage in sexting are 3 times more likely to consider suicide as those who hadn’t engaged in sexting.

The Role of Bystanders in Digital Dating Abuse, Intimate Image Abuse and Cyberbullying

In typical dating relationship violence the bystanders generally know the victim and/or the abuser. They may be mere witnesses to the abuse, or knowingly or unknowingly help facilitate it. These same types of bystanders exist in a digital environment but are joined by two significant additional types of bystanders – strangers who witness the abuse and know neither the victim nor the abuser, and “cybermobs”, ”flamers” or “trolls”.

Offline abusers, typically, avoid witnesses to their abuse (especially when the abuser is seeking to hide the abusive activity or blame it on the victim). Even when the abuse is designed to ruin the reputation of someone, it is staged not to appear as abuse.  As a result, offline abuse is often a secret to everyone except perhaps the victim’s closest friends and family. 

But because of the nature of online social communities with more than 1 billion users, it is highly likely that strangers will witness digital abuse that is posted online or sent in viral messages. When someone shares an intimate image of a third party taken by someone else, and you don't know the person in the intimate image, you are a "stranger witnessing digital abuse."

Those who receive or view that picture “of some naked girl” are strangers witnessing digital abuse. They can report it, ignore and delete it or pass it on. And their choice can make a significant difference in the duration and scope of the digital abuse. And, to the victim trying to contain the abuse, it can make all the difference in the world. Empowering bystanders to report what they see is crucial. To do that, we have to address the issues that cause them to ignore it and move on:

·        Awareness programs have to teach them what should be reported.

·        The bystander must understand that a good faith report, even if it turns out to be wrong, will not come back and haunt them.

·        The networks need to make reporting abuse easy and remind their users that abuse reports are confidential.

·        And they must be convinced that their making the report makes a difference. If they think their abuse report will end up down a black hole, they won’t bother reporting what they see.

Reporting abuse is one of the easiest ways for a bystander to do something. Yet, few make the effort. Sometimes they aren’t sure if the report is warranted. They may worry that they have misread the situation and might get blamed for making a report that turns out to be groundless. 

They also often believe that the person or account being reported is given their name or contact information if they render a report. Some don’t know where or how to report something, or believe that the network or site doesn’t do anything when abuses are reported. Few understand what the network or site will take action on, never having read the terms of service when joining.

On top of these unknowns, bystanders often don’t want to get involved. It might take more time and effort than they are willing to expend. They may not have a stake in helping a stranger. And if the target is known to them, the abuser may be as well.

This is why it is crucial for their reports to be effective. Knowing where and how to report different kinds of abuse can sometimes mean the difference between someone taking action based on a report or it sitting in limbo. This year, as part of our StopCyberbullying initiative, we will be helping bystanders report digital abuse, intimate image abuse and cyberbullying through guides, apps and helplines.

For more information, visit StopCyberbullying.org and StopCyberbullying.ca.

Sexting and US Legal Approaches (for lawyers, policymakers and child protection professionals)

Sexting is a difficult issue. (Sexting involves images, both still and video. Sexual communications  sent in textual form,  are called “cybering.”)  It is problematic for three special reasons, beyond the obvious of images of nude minors or those engaged in sexual activities:

1. Sexting images are often used to attack those featured in those images by cyberbullies. Those in them are more vulnerable to bullying and cyberbullying.

2. Given the nature of the images and the desire to keep parents from learning about them, many minors are “sextorted” into engaging in sexual acts or sending more images to keep their blackmailer quiet.

3. The minors taking, sending or possessing the sexting images of other minors can be charged with child pornography and sexual exploitation crimes, such as the production, distribution and possession of child pornography, or endangerment of a minor.

Although “sexting” is a more recent trend, given the enhanced ability of cell phones and mobile devices to take and share images, the practice of taking nude or sexually provocative digital images and sharing them with others has been going on for more than 11 years. Parry Aftab worked on her first case of a teen voluntarily sharing a sexual video in 1998.

A young teen, to get the attention of a teen boy she liked, took and shared a digital video with him. It showed her performing mock oral sex and touching herself while nude. The boy received the video, and while he was not interested in seeing her, shared the video with his friends. The video eventually made its way to the Internet and peer-to-peer video sharing sites. Taking a sexual video and sharing it with someone was harder then. Now anyone armed with a video-capable cell phone can take and share the video with the click of a few keys. It can be hosted for free and shared with everyone or a select few or individual. And it is becoming commonplace enough that the shock value no longer exists.

To date, the typical approach to preventing and addressing sexting has been lectures about morals and warnings of the legal risks involved. But when pitched against raging hormones and love, these approaches are not very effective.

While we have to continue to create awareness and improved understanding of the risks involved, Parry Aftab believes we have to consider and adopt new laws or revisions to existing ones to deal with the reality that our young people are taking, sharing and possessing sexual images of their partners, their friends and others they know in the same way they may engage in sexual activities. The registered sex offender laws were never designed to include minors who are engaging, voluntarily, in taking and sharing sexual images of themselves as sex offenders. The child pornography laws were not designed to charge minors engaged in voluntary sexting activities.

Years ago, when the statutory rape laws were amended to reflect the reality of minors engaging in voluntary sexual relations with other minors, we addressed a similar issue. Until then, boyfriend and girlfriend could not legally engage in consensual sexual relations if they were underage. We relied on prosecutorial discretion and law enforcement common sense to prevent injustices before the laws were changed. Now, it is especially ironic that because of the updating of those laws and the existence of older child pornography and sexual exploitation of minors laws, a minor can be charged with taking a picture of a legal sex act, even if it is fully-voluntary. There is one inescapable solution -the child pornography laws should be updated to mirror the statutory rape laws.

Some states have done that, or sought to address it in similar ways. Some states decriminalized voluntary sexting of minors or reduced the severity of charges when the acts are voluntary. Illinois changed their juvenile adjudication laws to include juveniles charged with voluntary sexting offenses, effective January 1, 2011. While the law does not preempt child pornography or other more serious changes, it provides authority for those determining the dispositional orders to mandate counseling or community service. (705 ILCS 405/3-40, http://www.ilga.gov/legislation/publicacts/fulltext.asp?Name=096-1087, accessed January 13, 2011.)

Others provide a defense if the minor can prove that they did not solicit a sexting image and were intending to delete it or report it. Arizona’s law, adopted in May 2010 does a good job of that. In its early legislative history, it mentions Philip’s case. He was an 18 year old in Florida who broadcast his ex-girlfriend’s nude image to all of her friends and family after a bad breakup. She was still under 18, and he was prosecuted as distributing child pornography. (See the MTV Sexting special When Privates Go Public [insert link].) While the law makes taking the image or sharing it a class 2 misdemeanor, those receiving an image who intend to get rid of it or report it are exempt from the law. (Title 8, Chapter 3, Article 1, Arizona Revised Statutes, Section 8-309, http://www.azleg.gov/FormatDocument.asp?inDoc=/legtext/49leg/2r/laws/0276.htm, accessed January 13, 2011.)

Vermont’s law, adopted in 2009, expressly exempts minors taking sexting images of themselves from being charged under the child pornography state laws or required to register as a sex offender. It also  prevents those possessing sexting images transmitted to them from the minor who took them of themselves from being charged under those laws or required to register as a sex offender if they took “reasonable steps” to destroy or delete them (whether or not successful). Prosecutions of minors are reserved for the Family Court system and juvenile proceedings. Those convicted will have their records expunged when they reach the age of 18.
Ironically, and probably in reaction to reports of consensual sexting and one of the couple having turned 18 when the actions occurred, adults who have received an image from the minor taking a sext and who have taken reasonable steps to delete or destroy them only face a maximum $300 fine and up to 6 months imprisonment and are exempt from sex offender registry laws. (Note that first offenders are exempt from prosecution under the more serious child pornography laws, but even multiple offenders are exempt from the laws requiring sex offender registration for these acts, unless charged under other sexual exploitation laws.)  Parry Aftab believes that while some of these changes are good, others may have gone too far, especially when adults are involved.

Some states didn’t change the existing laws, but clarified that prosecutors have more discretion when minors are involved with consensual sexting.  Ohio took that tact, and with the assistance and support of Cynthia Logan and Parry Aftab a bill was written and adopted.

And at least one state, NJ, adopted a diversionary program for minors engaged in sexting.  (A “diversionary program” involves minor crimes (typically not felonies), first offenders not likely to reoffend and requires that the accused staying out of trouble for a certain period of time. It is sometimes called “early intervention”, “adjournments pending dismissal” or similar procedural descriptions. If there is no re-offense, the matter is dismissed with prejudice and there is no criminal record or penalty.) (Assembly, No. 4069 , State of New Jersey, 213th Legislature, introduced June 11, 2009, sponsored by Assemblywoman Pamela R. Lampitt, District 6 (Camden), http://www.njleg.state.nj.us/2008/Bills/A4500/4069_I1.HTM, accessed January 13, 2011.) This approach combines education with adjudication, a powerful combination.

Parry believes that diversionary problems blend the best of both providing justice and common sense when cyberbullying or sexting laws are implicated. While everyone’s first reaction may be to rescind laws relating to minors taking, sharing or possessing sexual images of each other, we need to be cognizant of the fact that sextortion is a real risk, adults prey on minors using any vulnerability they can discover and that many young people use the sext as a weapon to destroy the reputation of other minors, driving at least three to suicide.
Others may believe that the laws are fine as written, hoping that prosecutorial discretion is a sufficient safeguard against injustice. But we have seen several cases where the prosecutors are part of the problem, not the solution. And the child pornography sentencing guidelines for federal cases are a real problem, even for those of us who believe that child pornography crimes should be strenuously prosecuted and offenders receive stiff penalties worthy of the crime committed.

The importance of state and federal law changes to either provide more discretion or prosecutors or diversionary programs and family court alternatives is highlighted by a quick review of the US federal child pornography sentencing guidelines. While under review based on criticism that the sentencing guidelines established by Congress are over-reaching and excessive, they remain in effect (although may not be binding). Individuals found guilty receive at least 5 years minimum sentence, enhanced for use of the Internet or digital devices, contact with the minor and other factors in common between voluntary sexting among minors and those of sexual predators and child sexual exploitation. (To read more about the history of these guidelines, visit http://www.ussc.gov/Research/Research_Projects/Sex_Offenses/20091030_History_Child_Pornography_Guidelines.pdf.)

Child pornography, under the US federal laws, is:

the visual depiction of a person under the age of 18 engaged in sexually explicit conduct. See 18 U.S.C. §§ 2256(1) and (8). This means that any image of a child engaged in sexually explicit conduct is illegal contraband. Notably, the legal definition of sexually explicit conduct does not require that an image depict a child engaging in sexual activity. See 18 U.S.C. § 2256(2). A picture of a naked child may constitute illegal child pornography if it is sufficiently sexually suggestive. In addition, for purposes of the child pornography statutes, federal law considers a person under the age of 18 to be a child. See 18 U.S.C. § 2256(1).

It is irrelevant that the age of consent for sexual activity in a given state might be lower than 18. A visual depiction for purposes of the federal child pornography laws includes a photograph or videotape, including undeveloped film or videotape, as well as data stored electronically which can be converted into a visual image. For example, images of children engaged in sexually explicit conduct stored on a computer disk are considered visual depictions.

(Quoting the Department of Justice’s Child Exploitation and Obscenity Section’s Citizen's Guide to United States Federal Child Exploitation Laws, http://www.justice.gov/criminal/ceos/citizensguide_porn.html, accessed on January 14, 2011)

Why is SnapChat a Problem?

Many apps and technology tools take on a life of their own. They are designed for one purpose and used for another. The major influence with digital apps and tools is how teens use it. Teens made MySpace popular in 2005. They made FormSping popular in 2009. (They also dropped them both like hot potatoes, and caused their demise or imminent demise.) SnapChat is one of those tools. Designed to allow app users to share a quick pic that isn't important enough to post on your FB page or instagram to someone. Maybe you're at the Cheescake Factory and wanted to share a pic of the enormous slice of cheesecake with your friend whose on a diet. Maybe you want to snap and share a quick pic of your outfit. Or want an opinion on which handbag to carry, flowers to buy or the price of steak. A picture is worth 1000 words and sometimes conveys the thought better than 1000 characters in a text. The image sent dissolves after 10 seconds, and the tool won't allow you to save it. But, as with MySpace and FormSpring before it, SnapChat was discovered by kids and became the next hot tech tool, featured on the cover of BusinessWeek and in the Wall Street Journal. So far, so good. So what is it in my cross-hairs? Two reasons: Criminals Use It and Law Enforcement Can't: Because it is so easily abused, and the checks and balances that any responsible tech enterprise should build or put in place are lacking. Law enforcement needs the data to be maintained for longer than 10 seconds to track criminals (including child pornographers and child molesters). From the time the complaint is made, they need to serve notice to the network to preserve the evidence and data and then a subpoena demanding the evidence needed to track the criminals. SnapChat does store anything, or at least claim they don't. SnapChat makes every child porngrapher's fav list. They can tease others using child porn images that disappear in 10 seconds. :-( Because They Think It Can't Be Saved, Users Post Images They Wouldn't If They Knew It was Permanent: Young people are sexting (pictures of naked teens and preteens, including them engaged in sexual activities) more often, thinking the image will "self-destruct" like the contract instructions in Mission Impossible. They don't worry about the image making its way into the principal's hands or their parents email box. But what they hadn't considered was that most mobile devices have a screen capture tool, allowing the users to capture it indirectly. What the user thought was temporary, becomes permanent. While sexting isn't SnapChat's fault, promises it makes and lack of education/warning tips are. Young people need to learn that everything is permanent if it's digital. If they address these two major concerns, I will be happy to set my sights on the next digital tool that isn't using its power responsibly.

Back to school - what should you be thinking about?

Milk forms, pencil cases (do they even have them anymore? :-)), backpacks, laptops, iPads, mobile phones, the "in" clothing, the latest loves, hates and crushes...it's back to school in North America. And parents are thinking about everything they need ot do to get their kids in school, learning and safe.

I will be publishing a series of blogs for parents on what they need to know. Simple themed tips to help you get through this in one piece.

Let's start with an easy one, cell phones:

Most schools have official or unofficial policies about cell phones on campus. Find out what they are. If the school doesn't permit cell phones in classrooms, don't think that a note from you will suffice to change this policy. Nor should it.

Cell phones don't belong in the classroom unless the teacher has a project designed to use them. They are distracting. They facilitate cheating on tests (the students take a pic of the test and text it to someone in the hall for answers). They waste time. They can be used to hurt other students or allow them to hurt your child.

If the school allows cell phones in lockers, support the rule. Remind your child that you control the cell phone and if they violate school policy with it, they lose it.

Show restraint. I know you would like to be able to reach your child whenever you want, fo any and all reasons, or sometimes no reason at all. But they are in school. If it's important, call the school office and ask your child to call you. If it's an emergency, do the same. If it's to send a message, the office works pretty well too.

Treat text like a call. If they are supposed to use the cell phone, it means text as well as calling. Don't encourage them to violate the policies, and don't allow them to violate it on their own.

Get their cell phone insured. They lose it, drop it into puddles and wash their jeans with the cell phone in the pocket. They are stolen, dropped under the bus and tossed like frisbies. It's worth the small insurance charge. It may also be insured already under your homeowners' insurance or with a gold or platinum credit card purchase.

The GPS is more valuable to find a missing phone (where they left it) than to find a missing child. But it can do both, easily.

Limit their ability to spend money with the phone on apps, games and offline items.

Know your plan, with free calling hours, numbers of texts and anything else that can sneak up on you.

Check their photos, videos and downloads often. Sexting is a serious and growing problem and an image of a classmate naked can result in serious sex offender criminal charges.

and finally remember one thing - you are the parent!
if all else fails - tell them to do it becasue you said so! :-)

Heck, it even sometimes worked for our parents. lol

Parry

Parry on the Today Show with Matt Lauer on Sextortion

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

The Associated Press: Feds: Online 'sextortion' of teens on the rise

The Associated Press: Feds: Online 'sextortion' of teens on the rise

US 3rd Circuit Ct of Appeals rules against prosecutor in sexting cases

to read the decision: http://www.ca3.uscourts.gov/opinarch/092144p.pdf

Parry Aftab to appear on American Morning CNN 6:30am March 22nd on sexting and sexual exploitation laws

I have worked in this area for years and years, ever since 1995. The first sexting case I was aware of occurred in 1998, before cell phones could take or transmit images. We called it "sexing" in the days before cell phones and the term coined to combine sex and texting. A young teen in NY took a sexual video of herself and gave it to a boy she liked. He shared it with the world.

Now, as MTV and Associated Press polls show that 2/3's of sexting is coerced, and those involved in sexting are 4 times more likely to contemplate suicide, we have to make this a priority.

But how do we advised policymakers? Do we ask them to decriminalize all creation, sharing or possession of images that legally constitute child pornography? If not, what do we want them to do?

Sexting that occurs consensually between teens who are involved can be treated like consensual teen sex with another teen, by amending the child pornography laws to match the statutory rape exemptions for consensual teen to teen sex. But what about those who maliciously spread the images to others, either to get revenge for the teen in the image breaking up with them, or because they want to ruin the reputation of the teen in the image.

In Canada they give limited immunity for the teens involved in the taking and initial sharing of the image, those making up the intimate relationship. Once it moves beyond them, it becomes criminal.

But not all sexting is consensual. A ten year old I know was extorted into taking a sexual image for a few thirteen year olds, threatened with sexual assault if she didn't comply. That's not sexting. That is aggravated sexual assault.

Lawyers do this all the time, so do policymakers. We look at a problem and craft a solution when laws are needed. We can set parameters and help prosecutors understand when community service is best, or counsling is needed, or the teen being charged needs to be treated as a criminal.

Some people think that we shouldn't be ciminalizing "dumb" behavior by teens. But we do all the time. If the drink and drive, it's "dumb" and criminal. If they steal, use a weapon, sell drugs, etc. it's a crime.

What we need to do is remind them of this. Education, awareness, peer-advisors, getting the cell phone companies involved, the digital video and still camera companies involved and the online providers involved...they are all crucial. We need to train prosecutors, judges, law enforcement, etc.

We need to support programs such as MTV's athinline.org campaign. We need to join forces. WiredSafety, the charity I run, has created a coalition called the Stop Cyberbullying Coalition. It handles all aspects of cyberbullying, including sextbullying (when teens spread the images to hurt someone). Our KID team, "kids in danger" team will continue its 15 year quest to stop sexual exploitation of minors.

It isn't justice when one case results in a teen going to jail or having to register as a sex offender for 40+ years, while the same set of facts results in a slap pon the wrist somewhere else. So, we need ot chage the laws. But "decriminalizing" sexting as a blanket policy without looking at the circumstances, whether the actions were predatory, malicious or purely consensual isn't the way. Careful, thoughtful, smart people need to joint forces to find the right way. No kneejerk reactions. But creating exemptions to the law that allow for community service, mandated counseling or no charges under the right circumstances, while giving law enforcement the tools to stop predatory, threatening and true sexual exploitation is.

My 5 sexting tips for teens:

1. If you receive a sexual image of a minor, even if you know them, delete it.
2. Don't take an image you don't want your parents, the police, your principal or a predator to see.
3. What you post online stays online together.
4. If you think what you store on your cell phone is private and no one can access it - think again. How carefully do you guiard it? Do others ever use it? Are you sure your kid brother or your parents aren't "checking things out"?
5. If you love him, bake him cookies, don't send him a sext. And if you love her, don't ask for one.

Pew and MTV/AP studies explore sexting and teens

How many teens are taking a nude or sexual image, sending it, posting it or keeping a copy of it? 20%? 34%? more?
The answer is...too many!
I talk to an average of 10,000 students a month. This is an imortant issue to and about them. They want to know what to do if asked for a pic, if someone sends them one unolicited and how to handle sextbullying when it gets going.
In a remarkable resource (I was honored to be a part of) MTV and other experts designed athinline.org to give teens, their friends and family and other stakeholders answers to the questions they have. From how to indentify digital abuse to helping them stand up to their peers or getting help when they need it - it's all there.

MTV, WiredSafety, Facebook, Liz Claiborne and others launch a huge campaign to address digital abuse among teens - sexting, cyberbullying and more

MTV LAUNCHES MULTI-YEAR INITIATIVE “A THIN LINE” TO EMPOWER YOUTH TO STOP SPREAD OF DIGITAL ABUSE

New AP/MTV Study Finds 50% of 14-24 Year Olds Have Experienced Digital Abuse,
3 in 10 Have Sent or Received Nude ‘Sext’ Messages

Network to Air MTV News ‘Sexting’ Special; $75,000 ‘Redraw the Line Challenge’ Calls on Audience to Imagine Digital Solutions

Best-in-Class Partners Include Facebook, MySpace, The Family Violence Prevention Fund, Anti-Defamation League, and More

New York, NY, December 3rd, 2009 -- MTV today unveiled “A THIN LINE,” a new multi-year initiative to empower America’s youth to identify, respond to and stop the spread of digital abuse. Digital abuse is an emerging issue that includes behaviors like “sexting,” cyberbullying and digital dating abuse. According to a new study released today by MTV and The Associated Press exploring the full scope of digital abuse, 50 percent of 14 – 24 year olds have been the target of some form of digital abuse, and 30 percent have sent or received nude photos of other young people on their cell phones or online. Full survey findings are available at research.ATHINLINE.org.
MTV’s “A THIN LINE” will address digital abuse issues through a series of on-air, online and real world initiatives including integration in MTV’s top-rated programming, an MTV News special focused on Sexting, True Life: I have Digital Drama, thought-provoking PSAs, innovative online and mobile tools and the “Redraw the Line Challenge” -- which calls on young people to submit innovative digital antidotes to digital abuse. Today, MTV also launched www.ATHINLINE.org where young people can access information, resources and support on issues related to digital abuse.
“Our audience lives online, and while every generation deals with their own set of abuse issues, the digital sphere exponentially increases opportunities for misuse,” said Stephen Friedman, General Manager of MTV. “There is a very thin line between private and public, this moment and forever, love and abuse, and words and wounds. ‘A THIN LINE,’ is built to empower our audience to draw their own line between digital use and digital abuse. “
MTV’s partners on “A THIN LINE” include a coalition of the foremost authorities on all facets of digital abuse, including Facebook, MySpace, The Family Violence Prevention Fund, WiredSafety, Anti-Defamation League, Blue Shield of California Foundation, loveisrespect.org, The National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline, National Network to End Domestic Violence, The Liz Claiborne Inc., DoSomething.org, Break the Cycle, Ruder Finn, Teenangels and PBS’ FRONTLINE. “A THIN LINE” kicked off today in tandem with Liz Claiborne Inc.’s It’s Time To Talk Day, an annual day dedicated to ensuring that Americans speak-up and raise national attention around domestic violence including teen dating violence and intimate partner abuse.
Elements of “A THIN LINE” include:
• Associated Press / MTV Digital Abuse Study: The study, released today, offers an in-depth look at the pervasiveness of digital abuse, how it’s affecting America’s youth, how they’re responding to it, their concerns and much more. Key findings from the report show that 3 in 10 young people have sent or received nude pictures of other young people on their cell or online, and 61 percent who have “sexted” report being pressured to do so at least once. Beyond significant others, 29 percent of respondents who have shared naked images of themselves did so with someone they only knew online and never met in person, and 24 percent shared the images with someone they were interested in dating or hooking up with.
Additionally, 12 percent of those who have “sexted” have contemplated suicide, four times more likely than those who haven’t (12% vs. 3%, respectively). Further, targets of digital abuse are almost three times as likely to contemplate suicide as those who haven’t encountered it (8% vs. 3%), and nearly three times more likely to have considered dropping out of school.
When it comes to online behavior, only half think their actions could come back to haunt them, and 1 in 4 believe that their digital actions could have legal consequences. To view the full study, please head to research.ATHINLINE.org.
• MTV News Special Report: Sexting: MTV News will take a deeper look at a developing trend affecting teens across the nation: sexting. By speaking directly to young people who have been personally impacted by digital abuse, the 30 minute special, set to premiere timed to Valentine’s Day 2010, will examine how this trend is impacting youth culture and relationships, the stakes involved – from legal to emotional to reputational – and how “sexting” is becoming a new frontier for teen dating abuse.
• “True Life: I Have Digital Drama”: MTV’s Emmy-Award winning, ground-breaking documentary series will take a close look at how digital platforms are creating trust, privacy and harassment issues for two young couples.

• Redraw the Line Challenge: Young people are disproportionally affected by digital abuse – and they are best equipped to truly address its viral spread. With support from Blue Shield of California Foundation, MTV is asking America’s youth to imagine high-potential digital antidotes -- such as new mobile or Web-based services, social games or viral content -- that help stop the spread of digital abuse. The winning individual or team will be rewarded with $10K, plus a chance to work with MTV – and a development budget of up to $75K – to see their idea actualized. For more details, head to challenge.ATHINLINE.org.
• PSAs: The backbone of the campaign is a suite of thought-provoking PSAs that address a wide range of digital behaviors including coerced sexting, textual harassment, digital prejudice, threatening messages, ganging up and much more. The first wave of campaign PSAs were directed by acclaimed director Joel Schumacher, and include spots like “Public Nudity” and “Tattoo.”

• Online and Mobile Tools: “A THIN LINE” gives young people one-click access to digital abuse information, resources and support systems online or on their cell phones at ATHINLINE.org. The online hub helps teens understand the hallmarks of healthy relationships, while providing suggested responses and help if they or their friends are encountering abuse, and will host a vibrant conversation on the issue. Users can also access the campaign’s resources by texting “line” to 66333.

• MTV’S “A THIN LINE” Advisory Board: MTV has built a coalition of the foremost authorities on digital abuse, including leading experts in cyber-crime, teen dating violence, adolescent psychology, and other teen issues. Advisory board members include Parry Aftab, Executive Director of Wired Safety and StopCyberbullying.org; Esta Soler, Founder and President, Family Violence Prevention Fund; Jane Randel, Vice President of Corporate Communications, Liz Claiborne Inc.; Virginia Witt, Director of Public Affairs and Policy at Blue Shield of California Foundation; Dr. Jill Murray, psychologist and internationally-recognized expert on teen dating abuse; Cindy Southworth, Founder and Director or the Safety Net Project at the National Network to End Domestic Violence; and Casi Lumbra, a teen online security expert, who has addressed audiences at the United Nations and Harvard Law School.

• Liz Claiborne Inc.’s It’s Time To Talk Day: “A THIN LINE” kicked off today in tandem with Liz Claiborne Inc’s It’s Time To Talk Day, an annual day dedicated to ensuring that Americans speak-up and raise national attention around domestic violence including teen dating violence and intimate partner abuse. This year, the day will include a specific focus on digital abuse, as the company announces that it is updating its Love Is Not Abuse curriculum to include a lesson specifically on digital dating abuse for schools across America. As of August 2009, the curriculum, which aims to raise awareness of dating abuse and provide resources for help, has been distributed to approximately 6,000 schools and organizations across all 50 states. The Love Is Not Abuse curriculum is offered free of charge at www.loveisnotabuse.com.
• Educational Curriculums: MTV is working to make the campaign’s assets available as teaching tools, as part of existing curriculums on cyber bullying and dating abuse from Liz Claiborne, Hazelden, WiredSafety’s StopCyberbullying and the Anti-Defamation League – currently taught in thousands of high and middle schools nationwide.
For more information on MTV’s “A THIN LINE” campaign, or details on how to get involved, please visit AThinLine.org or head to the campaign’s Facebook, MySpace or Twitter pages.
Partner and Advisory Board Quotes:

“The safety of our users is paramount to us, and only by working together can we seek to educate young people about the dangers of digital abuse and cyberbullying,” said Tim Sparapani, Director of Public Policy at Facebook. “We applaud and support MTV for all of the work it has done to launch ‘A Thin Line,’ and are pleased to be a part of this important initiative which both empowers and educates.”
“With today’s teens living their lives online, we must all work together to empower teens with the know how they need to live their lives online and off—with courage, strength, and dignity,” said Hemanshu Nigam, Chief Security Officer of MySpace and News Corporation. “MySpace is proud to partner with MTV for the ‘A Thin Line campaign’ to give our youth the knowledge they can use now and tomorrow to be well-balanced and well-protected digital citizens.”

“We are very proud to collaborate with MTV on this important work to help stop digital abuse,” said Esta Soler, President of the Family Violence Prevention Fund. “By raising awareness of digital abuse in an innovative and relevant way, ‘A Thin Line’ will shine a spotlight on a problem that is affecting our young people in countless schools and communities across the country.”
“Digital abuse is so pervasive today that many young people consider standard online behavior,” said Parry Aftab, Executive Director of WiredSafety and StopCyberbullying.org. “‘A THIN LINE’ is a vehicle for change that should spark a national conversation and hopefully awaken young people to a better understanding of how to protect themselves digitally.”
"It's encouraging that MTV is taking a youth empowerment approach with this exciting new campaign,” said Virginia Witt, Director of Public Affairs and Policy at Blue Shield of California Foundation. “Youth should lead the way in dialing down their relationship drama."

"’A Thin Line’ is one of the most ambitious and well executed projects I've had the pleasure to be involved with,” said Dr. Jill Murray. “The fact that MTV is addressing it's audience in such an important and thoughtful manner will do so much to stem the tide of digital technology abuses."

“Teen dating violence and abuse is pervasive and made all the more dangerous by the very technology intended to help us stay more connected,” said Jane Randel, Vice President of Corporate Communications, Liz Claiborne Inc. “Parents and schools need to recognize that their kids are dealing with these issues regularly and learn how to address both dating abuse and the digital abuse that can go along with it. It is only through education – annually in middle and high schools and at home – that we can start to break the cycle of violence that is gripping our nation.”

“Dating abusers will misuse any technology device, from spoofing caller ID and text messages to terrorize a victim to remotely installing SpyWare to monitor the victims every computer move,” said Cindy Southworth, Founder and Director or the Safety Net Project at the National Network to End Domestic Violence. “MTV's innovative digital abuse campaign will reach millions and help keep technology from being misused to harm and abuse. “

About MTV:
MTV is the dynamic, vibrant experiment at the intersection of music, creativity and youth culture. For over 28 years, MTV has evolved, challenged the norm, and detonated boundaries -- giving each new generation a creative outlet and voice that entertains, informs and unites on every platform and screen. On-air, MTV is the number one rated full-day ad-supported cable network for P12-24. Online, MTV.com averaged 8.5 million monthly unique visitors during the first quarter of 2009 -- up +6% from Q4/2008 and up +6% year-over-year. Total video streams for the first quarter of 2009 increased 21% over the same time period last year. And MTV’s successful sibling networks MTV2, mtvU and MTV Tr3s each deliver unprecedented customized content, super-serving music fans, college students and young American Latinos like no one else. MTV is part of MTV Networks, a unit of Viacom (NYSE: VIA, VIA.B), one of the world’s leading creators of programming and content across all media platforms. Wanna know more? Come on in… www.mtvpress.com
###
Contact:
MTV
Janice Gatti, +1-212-846-8852
janice.gatti@mtvstaff.com

the StopCyberbullying Coalition Roundtable on Capitol Hill

MEDIA ALERT *** MEDIA ALERT *** MEDIA ALERT
CONTACT:

Parry Aftab
201-463-8663
Parry@Aftab.com

Jill Saunders
314-422-4523
JillS@BuildaBear.com
THE STOPCYBERBULLYING COALITION ROUNDTABLE
INDUSTRY, LAW ENFORCEMENT, ADVOCACY GROUPS AND TEENS AND PRETEENS JOIN FORCES ON CAPITOL HILL TO STOP CYBERBULLYING AND ADDRESS SEXTING AND CYBERABUSE ISSUES

Washington, DC – Cyberbullying and sexting incidents related harassment are touching most teens and preteens. 85% of middle schoolers reported being cyberbullied at least once. Only 5% would ever trust their parents with that information. Kids begin cyberbullying as young as 3rd grade and have identified 36 different ways to use a cell phone as a weapon against their classmates. Extortion is the method of choice of 4th graders who cyberbully. 44% of high school boys polled said they have seen at least one nude picture of a female classmate and 10% also admit to sending a nude picture to someone else (many unsolicited) using their cell phones. Sexting (sending nude photos via a cell phone) is a fast growing trend, affecting more and more teens and even preteens. And those involved can end up as registered sex offenders.
Who: Facebook, Microsoft, Disney, Build-A-Bear Workshop, AOL, Yahoo!, Google, MTV, Verizon, the Ad Council, Girl Scouts of the USA, Dolphin Entertainment, Parents of cyberbullicide victims Jessie Logan and Jeff Johnston, the Office of the Mayor of NY, WiredMoms, Liz Claiborne, Kids@Play, Buzz Marketing, the FTC, the US Department of Education and other Capitol Hill and industry leaders, law enforcement officials and child advocacy groups join expert Teens and Preteens in an engaging luncheon presentation and panels designed to address the problem. WiredSafety’s Executive Director, cyberlawyer Parry Aftab, and the award-winning Teenangels will moderate the highly interactive afternoon program.

What: Three hour-long panels to address the scope of cyberbullying risks, ways to reach teens and preteens effectively and empower them and engage them in creating solutions, what role laws play in preventing and addressing cyberbullying and how all stakeholders can work together for a common goal – to stop cyberbullying and break the cycle of sexting harassment.

When: Noon to 4pm (lunch provided) Space is Limited, Contact Parry Aftab for Info
Where: The US Senate Building (Russell SR325)
Why: Because “Cyberbullying Hurts!”

Join the StopCyberbullying Coalition. WiredSafety is the world’s oldest and largest cybersafety charity operating through grassroots volunteers worldwide. It operates StopCyberbullying.org and the StopCyberbullying Coalition to bring together all stakeholders to address and work together to stop cyberbullying.
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Parry's CNN appearance today on the latest sexting case

PHILLIPS: Another story we can't let go, several teens in Pennsylvania facing child porn charges because they allegedly texted nude pictures to each other, child porn charges. There is a similar case now in Wisconsin. They easily could be your kids. Don't believe me? Well, a recent survey found one in five teens post or text nude pictures of themselves. Lots to push forward, here.

Do the charges fit the crime? Heck, is this a crime at all? These are teens being teens but their hormones are now in bed with wireless gadgets. This is virgin territory for police, prosecutors, educators and lawmakers and parents. Seems like everyone could use a little sex education. Police in Chambersburg, Pennsylvania, want state law makers to figure out how to apply the law here. The law as is will make these teens regret hitting send for a long time.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

CHIEF DAVID ARNOLD, CHAMBERSBURG, PA.: Unfortunately, as the law exists right now, a student could be charged with a felony and have a lot of repercussions for them in the future.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PHILLIPS: And I asked the assistant school superintendent about the charges. This is what he said.

(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)

PHILLIPS (On camera): Do you support child porn charges against these kids?

ERIC MICHAEL, CHAMBERSBURG AREA SCHOOL DISTRICT: Based on the evidence we have so far, not in this instance. We need to realize that one reckless act could potentially follow them in their future and affect them if a very negative way. That is certainly not our intent. We feel the education component is far more important to make sure the students understand the full implications of what they've done.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PHILLIPS: So, basically, the problem here is that justice doesn't move nearly as fast as technology. So let's talk to Parry Aftab, she's a lawyer who specializes in Internet and privacy issues. You know, Parry, what's the answer?

PARRY AFTAB, ATTORNEY: Well, we need to understand that there are two pieces of sexting. Number one, if the kids are underage, they can be charged with production, distribution or possession of child pornography and they are around the country. They are, they've become registered sex offenders. So, we are trying to change those laws.

The second piece is once that image moves, boys generally tend to look at it because it's a naked image, but girls move it to cyber bully each other. We're holding an event in Washington, on the Hill, on Tuesday to address this issue.

PHILLIPS: Is that the Ohio bill that you're going to be testifying about?

AFTAB: Well, Ohio, we actually helped put in place. This is where Build A Bear and Google and Microsoft and Disney and Facebook are all joining me at a major event Tuesday to try to help spread the word. In fact, Cynthia Logan, the mom of Jesse Logan, the girl who took her own life after her sexting image was made public will be there to open summit.

PHILLIPS: OK. So, from what I understand, right now there really is no law that fits the crime. The only thing that is out there are porn charges. And if you -- if you charge a child with porn charges, I mean, you're basically going to ruin their life, right?

AFTAB: And it's not just porn charges, Kyra. It is child porn, which is you're now going to have them have to register with all those people who molest young children. We need to recognize that because of the laws with statutory rape written the way they are, kids can have sex with each other. They just can't take a picture and share it with each other.

PHILLIPS: OK, so how would you advise the DA right now, in Pennsylvania, that's dealing with almost 30 kids in this high school who have been sending naked pictures around? And because law enforcement is talking about charging them with child porn.

AFTAB: Well, they don't really have an option. It's either too hot or too cold. They either ignore it entirely or charge them under the only law that exists. What I would recommend is some discretion. I'm happy to actually drive out there and talk to the people in the community. And maybe we can get the kids to be involved in the charity that I run, Wired Safety, teaching each other about not being stupid and taking these pictures. And if we can make it community service rather than crime and a tag that will follow you forever, as a registered sex offender, that's the way to go.

But we also are going to have to give them the laws that give them that discretion, because right now they don't have them.

PHILLIPS: You know, you say something very interesting about these kids doing something that's stupid. I mean at that age, 13, 14, 15, 16, I mean I would never even imagine sending a nude picture of myself, you know, to somebody in school. I mean I think -- what's wrong with our kids? I mean at such a young age, why are they even thinking about doing this?

AFTAB: I think they fall into different groups. We're seeing it as young as 10. Where these kids are trying to look older and they're taking pictures and sending them to senior boys. They are all armed with cell phones 24/7 and a photo capability. And when they're bored or somebody had too many beers, or at a slumber party and nothing else better to do, they will take an image and send it off. Once you click send, you've lost control.

So what we need to do is think about what we're putting into our kids' hands. Teach them that there are very serious ramifications here of taking these images, letting them know that even if they love him, when they break up that image may move, when he doesn't love you back.

And we need to also recognize that 10 percent of the teen boys we have polled have sent a naked picture to somebody and generally unsolicited. Like, hey guys, look at this. So we need to recognize that they think it's funny. They may be in love and think it's part of intimacy. They don't realize what's going to happen next.

PHILLIPS: You bring up a good point. It's not just changing the laws. But parents have got to step up and so do those school officials that -- and do some type of Internet safety training and educate our kids. I mean we're operating in a totally different world now.

Parry Aftab, always good to talk to you. Appreciate it.

AFTAB: Thanks, Kyra. And if they can follow us at Wired Moms, they'll get information about the summit on Tuesday on Twitter.

PHILLIPS: Wired Moms, that's on Twitter?

AFTAB: It's on Twitter.

PHILLIPS: Wired Moms, there you go, folks. All moms out there - and dads. Follow Parry Aftab. Thanks, Parry.

AFTAB: Thank you very much.

PHILLIPS: If your kids have cell phones, I know you've got something to say about this. Tweet me with your two cents at Kyra.cnn. I'll read some of your responses later in the newscast.

Sexting for Parents

What is Sexting?

“Sexting” is when someone sends a nude or sexual image to someone else using a cell phone. “Sexing” is when they do it using any interactive device, such as a webcam, digital camera or video, cell phone, game device, etc. Just as “textbullying” is a subset of “cyberbullying” “sexting” is a subset of “sexing.”

How Prevalent is It Really?

It’s everywhere, even where you least expect it – like on your teen’s computer, cellphone and game device. 44% of boys in coed high schools we polled reported seeing at least one image of a fellow female classmate in the nude. Most saw images of more than just one girl. And many saw multiple images of each girl. Your daughter may be among them.
And it’s not just girls. Boys are sending pictures too. They see it as a way to convince the girls that they are a good catch. Some do it when they are just being “boys.”

Younger teen and preteen girls see it as a sophisticated way of “flirting” and to audition for dates with older boys. It starts as young as 11, when the girls want to be “grown-up” and do what the “kewl teens” are doing. Sadly, the “kewl teens” know better, but this message isn’t making it through to the preteens.

It is far more prevalent among upper middle class to upper class teens than lower socio-economic class teens. It is often a product of too much time and technology on their hands. Too much peer pressure, too little self-respect and too few others willing to support pushing back when someone asks for a nude picture are the problem.

What Laws Apply to Taking a Sexting Photo, Sending It to Others or Keeping a Copy?

There are two sets of laws that apply when a minor is involved in sexing, and right now one is too hot and the other too cold:

1. Child pornography or sexual exploitation laws are very serious laws. You may have heard of Megan’s Law [check spelling]. It requires that people convicted of sexual exploitation laws register as sex offenders. Registered sex offenders may not live near a school or a public park and have to register wherever they move. Employers can learn that you are a registered sex offender and most social networks will not allow you to have an account. The laws were designed for the creeps who molest kids. But they also apply to minors who take naked pictures of themselves, share them with boyfriends or girlfriends or share them with others, or keep a copy. These are too hot for most cases of sexing.

2. Harassment laws cover some kinds of cyberbullying and when people use technology to harass others. They may apply if messages are sent anonymously and designed to annoy someone, or if they are designed to harass them. If the sexing images are being sent around, especially if it is being done to make fun of or embarrass another, these may apply to anyone who is forwarding or sharing the images. But they are rarely used and typically only involve a fine and a slap on the wrist. They are too cold.

What we need, like in Goldilocks and the 3 Bears, is an approach that it just right. That would involve converting the child pornography statutes, when un-coerced minors are involved on all sides, to a misdemeanor instead of a felony. This would avoid the sex offender registration. And when sexing is used as the weapon in harassment, we should have higher penalties.

What Should Parents Be Doing?
First, if your teen in involved in a sexing incident, get legal advice and get it early. If it’s your daughter’s or son’s photo that is being circulated or posted, you’ll need help stopping the bleed and having it removed from the networks. Reach out to the cyberstalking and harassment team at WiredSafety.org and they will show you what to do and give you some help doing it. Let the school know right away. Print out the “What Schools Should Know About Addressing Sexting Incidents” to take with you, or ask them to download it from WiredSafety.org or StopCyberbullying.org.
If you son or daughter has received a sextual image or video, delete it right away, or remove it from your cellphone, computer or other device and store it securely as evidence. Do not forward it to Parry Aftab, the police or anyone else. In doing so, you may be breaking the law and could be charged with distribution of child pornography (if the image qualifies as child pornography.

Second, be vigilant and realistic.

Your sweet cherubic fourteen year old daughter may be starring in more videos than last Halloween’s costume competition. If she is sexually active, her boyfriend may be demanding a nude picture to seal their love.
And groups, especially when alcohol is involved, are fertile ground for sexting. Ask your daugher’s friends to park their cell phones with you when sleeping over or attending a party at your house, especially if alcohol is being consumed (with or without your permission). Sexting is often the result of boredom and looking for excitement. The more digital photo capability they have, the more likely someone will use it.

Step-By-Step Proactive Prevention

Take a cyber-inventory.

Start out by asking what devices they carry around or use have photo or video capture features, or can be used to send images or video to others. Include webcams, Xbox and Wii, their cell phones, DS and PSP handheld gaming devices, Playstation 2 and 3, video and still image cameras.

If they want a new device, before you plunk down your hard-earned cash, ask if you can use it to take or store videos or digital pictures. Once you know which devices and technologies are image or video capable, learn how they work. Be aware of what others are bringing into the house for slumber parties or larger parties, and suggest they leave them with you or drop into the party from time to time to deliver soda and chips.

Trust But Verify

It’s important to trust your teens. But all you have to do is think back to your teenhood to know how important it is to verify, not just trust blindly. Ask and then check. Do spot checks without it looking like you are spying on them.
Once you have figured out where and how they can store pictures and videos, verify what is stored there. Check them regularly (make it a tech spot check) for any stored images. Check their laptops and the family desktops, portable drives, flash drives, media cards and any discs. Ask to see their social network profiles and their online accounts, including their instant messaging profiles.
If they have any online free storage services, such as a Microsoft or Sony online account, ask to see those too. Let them know you care and are watching. They may not be thrilled about it, but when Parry did the Good Morning America town meeting special with Diane Sawyer on sexting, of the eight parents selected to do spot checks on their teens, four found something they hadn’t expected. Two found that their teens’ classmates were sexting, and one of those had her images on his computer. If you look, you may find!

Have The Talk

Our recent studies showed that the teens have a “didn’t ask so I didn’t tell” approach. If you want to know what they are doing online, you have to ask.
Share Jessie’s story with them. She ended up taking her own life after her “private” nude image was shared by a boy she was seeing with the world. Before she gave up trying to fix her reputation and be able to walk around school or town without being called names, she appeared in shadow on TV pleading with other teen girls to think before doing the same thing. She didn’t want them to face what she was facing. Sadly, while others may have learned from her message, her own torment didn’t end. She was found hanging in her bedroom closet - dead. She was barely 18.
Use the news as a conversation starter. Just don’t lecture. Our kids don’t react any better to lectures than we did at that age. And teach them to respect themselves enough to withstand peer pressure and pressure from the boys they love.
If you need help, contact Parry Aftab or visit WiredSafety.org or StopCyberbullying.org.
cyb

Issues that make people passionate...

Over the last fifteen years since I have been a cyberlawyer and the last 12 years since I have been a voice in the kids online safety community there have been only a handful of issues that have moved everyone. The death of 13 yr old Christina Long at the hands of an Internet sexual predator 6 years ago, the suicide death of Meagan Meier after being tormented online at the hands of a middle-aged mother, Lori Drew 2-1/2 years ago, and sexting.

Jessie Logan was 18 when she took and shared a nude picture of herself with a boy she was seeing. He was 19. He shared the picture with a 16 year old girl who shared it with the world. When no one at her school would help her, and law enforcement turned a blindeye, Jessie appeared incognito on TV to share her story with other teens, warning them of the harassment and high costs of sharing nude pictures with others. Even then, the torment continued after after a schoolmate committed suicide for unrelated reasons, she hanged herself.

Her text messages had been deleted from her cell phone, when she tossed it into the center of her room before she died. No one knows what she had received before she died. She had just taken a shower and washed her hair and was spending the night with friends. It makes sense that the sudden change in mood had something to do with her constant tormentors.

But we'll never know.

When her mother, Cynthia, came out with Jessie's story and asked for tougher harassment laws and a lessening of penalties for young people voluntarily sharing their nude pics with other young people, instead of getting the sympathy she deserved for the loss of her only child, she receives torments of her own.

People post horrible things. And while the emails and posts are running 10 - 1 kind to mean, there are still too many mean messages.

Tina Meier received many mean messages too, following her going public about her daughter's tormentor. But Lori was very unsympathetic, so the messages were as much against a mother's horrible acts of targeting a vulnerable teen as for the Meiers.

But who is to blame in Jessie's case? A 19 year old boy she was seeing, a 16 year old girl who harassed her and a school and school resource officer who failed her? A legal system that wouldn't aid her in stopping the torment?

There is enormous sympathy for Jessie, and I am seeing a movement of young teens who are being more careful and helping spread the word about how much it hurts when you naked pic is circulated to everyone in town. Jessie wanted to help others avoid her pain and in death she will have a huge impact on helping others. The Jessie Challenge helps young people say "no" when asked for a pic, or say "no" when asked to pass it on, or say "enough" to this growing trend.

But there is even greater sympathy for boys and girls who are being charged as sex offenders, and if convicted of this serious felony, required to be a registered sex offender with all that entails. Boys are prosecuted more than girls are, for the same acts. People are angry about the inequity of that.

Even in her grief, Cynthia Logan is seeking equity for the kind of young people who harassed her daughter. She wants the penalities reduced when teens share their nude pics voluntarily with each other. She wants to make sure that teens are not charged as sex offenders, or required to register. She wants counseling, community service and public apologies when others are hurt. She wants an enhancement of the harassment laws when they use sexual exploitation as a weapon to hurt their victims, as well.

But more than anything else, she wants justice in her daughter's name. She wants to make sure that schools do their part when harassment takes place on campus during school hours. She wants achool resource officers to protect the students in their charge, even if they are 18-year-old seniors. They deserve protection as much as the sophmores, juniors, freshmen do. She wants apologies from the teens who made Jessie's life hell during the four months before her death. She wants kindness form the town in which she lives. She wants those who watch her on TV and read about her to understand her.

Many news outlets have mistakenly reported that I am her lawyer. I am not. I run the world's largest and oldest cybersafety charity. I am an unpaid volunteer, along with the rest of our all-volunteer charity staff. I happen to be a lawyer as well, but advise on policy and do not represent individuals. I am working with Cynthia to help raise awareness and find justice for Jessie and equity for other teens.

Those who post hateful messages attacking a grieving mother or blame Jessie for what her harassers did are missing the point. Unless we teach accountability and consequences to teens, far too many will do things they will regret. And when we, as teens did things we regretted we were lucky enough to have them contained in our small circles of friends, and communities. But the teens of today will find them everywhere. What you post online stays online - forever!

So, we need to balance all needs here:
1. The need for a balanced legal framework that punishes harassment at the right level, treats all actors equally, recognizes that the child exploitation laws should not apply to make stupid acts a felony sex offense;
2. The need for schools to be trained in how to handle cyberharassment and cyberbullying and be there to help when students are tormented and not make things worse;
3. The need to find help for students who are cyberharassed and cyberbullied and find themselves in the midst of hate campaigns, with people they can tak to, get help from and trust;
4. The need to teach parents that sexting and sexing ("sexing" is when any digital device is used, not only a cell phone) is far more common than they think and good kids are doing it, not only "those kids." And that parents have to stay informed, keep an eye on their kids and teach them about consequences and judgement;
5. The need for device manufacturers and service providers to help by creating awareness campaigns, abuse reporting buttons and taking action when their devices and services are used in cyberbullying and sexting campaigns.

Together we can address each of these, and if the people who are taking time to attack others or pass along misinformation and hype instead directed their time and efforts to helping, we'd be able to do so far faster and better than without them.

my 2 cents
Parry

a picture is worth a thousand words! especially when our teens are at risk!

Pics, pics and pics! Taking, sharing and commenting on pictures and videos online is one of teens’ favorite pastimes. They take them using their cell phones, Xbox 360, pocket video cameras and wifi-capable digital cameras. They store them on their DS and PSP devices, computers, flash drives, media cards and online services. The good thing is that these pics let them share their creativity and lives with family and friends. The bad thing is that it lets them share their personal information, impulsivity and sexuality with everyone online. Sexting (when young people share nude or sexual images of themselves and friends with others using text-messaging on cell phones) and Sexing (when they use any digital technology, including cell phones to do this) is on the rise and far more common than parents know.

Good teens, model students and teen leaders alike are all likely candidates for “girls gone wild” online! They start at about 13 and continue throughout their teens. The younger ones do it to look “mature” and audition for the older boys’ attention. The older teens do it to show how much they “love” their boyfriend or to get even after a bad breakup, showing him how much he is “missing.” They do it from a slumber party for fun, or take the pic of one of the girls they don’t like in the bathroom, locker room or dressing room to use as a weapon to hurt her. And boys do it too. Not as often as girls, but far too often.

And a picture is worth a thousand words! Even the more careful teens will share pictures or videos online that give away far too much personal information about them. Their house may appear in the background, or their car with license plate in plain view. Their Girl Scout uniform can give away their troop, which in turn gives away their location and activities. And even if they are careful about what they post, their friends may not be.

What’s the takeaway? Sit down and ask to see their “pics.” Look through their collections on their cell phones, gaming handhelds and Xbox, on their computers, flash drives and media cards and on Facebook, MySpace, myYearbook and Youtube and at PhotoBucket and Flickr online photo-sharing sites. Look at their friends pics too and follow your teen’s tagged pics. (They will show you what that means.) Be interested, don’t be a snoop. You may have some fun, share in your teen’s life and help them be safer all at once! If you don’t ask…they won’t tell!

Sexting Can Lead to Death...the story of Jessie Logan

Sexting Can Lead to Death
This morning I appeared on the Today Show with Matt Lauer and a very special mother, Cynthia Logan, to discuss what lead her daughter (Jessica) to suicide. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29546030/
Jessica was a bright, funny, great teen who lived in Ohio. When she turned 18, she was dating a 19 year old and sent a few nude photos of herself to him using her cell phone. When they broke up, he sent it to at least one 16-year-old girl who sent it to others. (He now claims that the 16-year-old took it form his cell phone without his knowledge.) The image made the rounds of Jessica’s school and the other community schools. What had been a private communication became public humiliation.
The students were cruel. They called her names and made fun of her. They dubbed her the “porn queen” and she became “that girl.” She confided in her mom, but only told her bits and pieces, never the whole scenario of the torment. Cynthia offered to take her out of school and homeschool her until graduation, but Jessica wanted to stick it out.
Jessie had sought help from her school’s school resource officer (the police officer assigned to her school). But he didn’t offer to do anything other than contact the girl who started the harassment and ask her to take down the images and leave Jessica alone. (Cynthia said that the SRO is now claiming that he gave Jessica the choice between his contacting the other girl and pressing charges, but denies that his claim is true.)
“No one would help!” When Jessie’s mom told me that, I had chills. Cynthia’s simple words and her soft tone (muffled by her trying to hold back tears) remind us that “there but for the grace of God” go all of us. Jessica didn’t want her mom to contact the other parents. (Targets of cyberbullying never do.) They didn’t know what to do.
Then Jessie came up with a plan. She would recount her story on TV to try and keep others from doing things they will regret. So, she appeared (in shadow with her voice disguised) on the local NBC affiliate in Cincinnati last year to help educate other teens about the risks of sexting.
While the TV piece was able to reach so many, the ones who mattered the most – Jessica’s harassers – were unmoved. The harassment continued. The teens were relentless. Cynthia knew that Jessica was hurting, but didn’t know how much. The school would send truancy reports home, but failed to share anything about the ongoing harassment. Why? That remains unanswered.
But Jessica stuck it out and graduated with her class. To Cynthia, it looked like things would improve. When a friend of Jessica’s asked her for a ride to the funeral of a fellow student, Mitch, who had killed himself Jessica became more troubled. “Why,” she asked her mother, “would a teen take his own life?” They talked about it. Cynthia said you never know what goes through someone’s mind when they consider something like this. Jessie seemed angry about Mitch’s suicide. But no one could have known that Jessica had ulterior motives when asking why this young man took his own life. She was looking to see if that was a viable choice for her.
The school never offered counseling for the other students after the young man’s suicide. They never offered counseling for Jessie. They said they couldn’t do anything because she was 18 and that students attended school at their own risk. They took the easy way out. And they failed Jessie..
Jessica went to the funeral with her friend, but didn’t come right home. Cynthia had to call her to get her to come home for dinner. She held the memorial information about the young man in her hand when she came through the doors and tossed it at Cynthia. She seemed agitated, angry. But Cynthia was used to this when things troubled Jessica and thought it was to be expected after the memorial service. The table was set as Jessie climbed the stairs to take a shower.
Cynthia was on a call with her brother when she walked down the upstairs hall. She passed Jessie coming out of the shower. She had no sense that anything was especially wrong.
But that was the last time Cynthia saw her daughter alive.
Cynthia walked upstairs and knocked at Jessie’s door. (She had a knock and open the door policy.) When she didn’t get an answer, she opened it to find Jessica’s cell phone in the middle of the room. She scanned the room looking for Jessica and the closet door was open. Her daughter hanging by her neck from the clothing rod.
Her husband bounded up the stairs at Cynthia’s screams, pulling out a pen knife to cut his daughter down. Jessica was already cold and blue. Their attempts to resuscitate her were futile.
Now Cynthia wants answers. What are the laws? How can she hold the school accountable? Can she make the teens responsible for this harassment apologize before their peers? How can she make sure that Jessica did not die in vain?
As soon as I heard her story, I knew this was something that would change the landscape in cybersafety. Like the story of Megan Meier and her suicide following the harassment of a neighborhood mom posing as a cute sixteen-year-old, Jessica’s name will mean something to teens and preteens.
It combines cyberbullying and the damage that teens can do to other teens when armed with embarrassing and private images and information. It makes the risks of sexting and cyberbullying real.
Sexting is a growing and serious problem. It’s when young people take nude pictures or images of them engaging in real or simulated sex acts on their cell phones or webcams and then send them to others by cell phone or webcams. About 20% of the teen girls we polled said they had taken a nude or sexually explicit cell phone picture or webcam shot of themselves and shared it with others (most often their boyfriends). 14% of the boys share these “private” images with others when they break up with their girlfriends. And 44% of the boys polled admitted to having seen at least one of these sexual images of a classmate.
22% of the girls polled said that they regretted whatever they had recorded on their webcam and 71% use them in their bedroom. And older teens and young adults are even more at risk, with almost 40% of the teens over 18 and college students we polled said they had shared a nude or sexual image with their boyfriend or girlfriend online or by cell phone.

Your daughter could be next.

Beginning immediately, I will be working with Cynthia and her husband Burt to spread awareness about Jessie and the consequences of cyberbullying and the risks of texting. We will be working with Jessie’s friends and my Teenangels to develop a campaign to reach teens and change behavior.

The new StopCyberbullying Coalition will bring individuals, companies, policymakers, educators, healthcare and mental health professionals and media together to address these issues. It will explore all aspects of cyberbullying and how sexting increases the risks of harassment and personal humiliation.

Interested in helping this become the last cyberbullying-related suicide? Want to help us spread the word about sexting and risks to young people online? Join us at WiredSafety.org. We need your help. Help us make sure your child won’t be next.

Jesse Logan - When Cyberbullying Kills....

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